


Sentiment

by Lalaurie



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Frigga (Marvel) Lives, Loki Feels, Loki Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-30
Updated: 2018-03-07
Packaged: 2018-11-21 08:21:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 43,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11353557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lalaurie/pseuds/Lalaurie
Summary: Amber thought it was a good idea, moving to New York. There were some minor setbacks, however. Alien invasions, Norse gods, a giant hole in the sky.. Well, perhaps moving to New York wasn't such a good idea after all. And then there was the God of Mischief. She kept running into him, and there was something not quite right about the whole thing... (There shall be fluff!)





	1. The Day for Horrible Decisions

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, lovely people!  
> So, after breaking my own heart repeatedly by reading countless Loki-fics, I have now decided to un-break my heart by writing a 'Less Angst – More Love' fic. Sooo, there will be some fluff. Consider yourself warned.  
> Like Tom Hiddleston says: 'it's kinda weird, 'cause he's so...sad. I just want to make it all right for him.'  
> I hope you'll like my story!
> 
> All right, here we go!

 

-o-

Swedish philosopher Nick Bostrom said 'Discovering traces of life on Mars would be of tremendous scientific significance: The first time any signs of extraterrestrial life had ever been detected. Many people would also find it heartening to learn that we're not entirely alone in this vast, cold cosmos.'

'Heartening' was not the word Amber Day would have chosen, that much was certain. She would perhaps have used words like 'horrifying' or 'awful' instead. She would, in fact, have preferred to be entirely alone in this vast, cold cosmos.

But, as it were, they were not entirely alone in this vast, cold cosmos - not at all. Extraterrestrial life was as of now a proven fact, and it was not of the sweet and benevolent 'E.T. phone-home-be-good' kind. Of all the movies made about alien invasions, Amber thought Independence Day was rather close to the truth. Bill Pullman had yet to appear and hold a rousing speech, however, so things were not looking good at this point.

There had not been any warning before it happened either, because the aliens had - instead of flying in from space, in a polite, orderly fashion - opened a hole in the sky, right over New York. Spaceships in different shapes and sizes had proceeded to pour out of the hole, and was _still_ pouring out of the hole.

Things were not looking good, indeed. They were looking rather awful, in fact.

The descent to 'awful' began just a few days ago, when Amber had – like any other day – been on her way to the university where she was studying literature. She had moved to New York not too long ago for that sole purpose – studying literature. What a horrendous decision that had been. She should have stayed in England. Lovely, quiet England, where impossible things didn't happen. Rarely happened, anyway.

She had moved because she needed a change. A change of profession, more specifically. Three years in the army, and then almost nine months in Afghanistan would do that to you.

Amber was twenty-nine years old, and was satisfied with what she had achieved in life so far. She was a trained nurse, and after joining the army, she had gone through the motions to become a combat medic as well.

Eventually, her training had landed her as a combat medic in Afghanistan, and even though she could say she had saved a lot of lives… Well, she needed a change.

And so, she had moved to New York – away from England where impossible things didn't happen.

In New York, however, impossible things _did_ happen, and Amber had the 'pleasure' of experiencing said impossible things first hand just a few days ago.

**_\- Flashback -_ **

Amber stopped when she heard all kinds of commotion, people screaming, a lot of running, and of course she had to run _toward_ the commotion, resulting in her being 'trapped' in a crowd of people, and was currently fighting her way out - attempting to fight her way out, at least.

Of course, fighting her way out turned out to be a bad decision. A horrible decision, in fact.

She managed to get free from the crowd, just to find her way blocked. It hadn't been blocked a mere second ago, so she was confused to say the least. The confusion of it all made her unable to actually stop running, so she ran directly into the sudden blockage.

"Oh my god, I'm sorry!" she exclaimed, quickly stepping back. There was no reply, and she carefully looked at this 'blockage'.

A man was standing in front of her, and she immediately realised that she was in big trouble. This was not just _any_ man.

The first sign was his attire. Because, wow, that was quite the getup. Black leather - there was a whole lot of black leather going on - skin-tight suit, with details in gold. He had a green cape attached by the shoulders of the ankle-length coat he was wearing. The coat was black and green, with a high collar, protective plating on his shoulders and down his arms – also gold, of course.

He was carrying a staff - sceptre - something, and it had a glowing crystal at the top - shining bright blue.

The most noticeable thing, however, was his golden helmet.

Horns. It had horns. And not just any horns, no, it was two, huge, backward-curling horns. Like a goat - or gazelle, perhaps. No, not that either. What was that animal called - the one who had this type of horns? Nubian Ibex - or something.

The helmet was quite frankly utterly ridiculous. It would have made anyone look like a complete imbecile. Anyone but him, apparently. She was a bit impressed by the way he managed to pull off a gold helmet with horns, when she thought about it.

Also, he had blue eyes. _Very_ blue eyes.

_Fuck are you doing?_ she thought as she was just standing there, staring at him. _Why are you thinking about his eyes? Focus!_

He was staring at her as well, and he did not like it when people slammed into him, if his expression was anything to go by.

"How _dare_ you," hissed the man, and she swallowed a lump in her throat. "How _dare_ you, mortal."

Mortal. Hm. She had to file that away somewhere, so she could analyse it later. Because 'mortal?' Really?

"I'm sorry," she said, and couldn't quite make herself look away - or run away - something she probably should do. "I meant no harm."

He gave her the proverbial evil eye, and slammed the staff in the ground, resulting in a flash of blue that almost knocked the air from her lungs.

"Kneel before me," the man said in a commanding voice, and she had no idea what to do. "I said, _KNEEL!"_

Everyone kneeled, and after gazing at the man for a moment, so did she.

Because why not, quite frankly. This was not the time for political statements.

"I am Loki, of Asgard!"

She didn't even think what she was doing when her head snapped up. "What, really?"

His blue eyes fixed on her, and she immediately realised how much of a bad idea that had been. This was the day for horrible decisions, apparently.

"What do we have here?" he said silkily, causing a whole new level of terror in her. "A rebel? A mere mortal, speaking against a god?"

She stared at the ground, shaking her head.

"Answer me," he hissed. "Look at me."

She looked up, meeting his eyes. "I believe you," she heard herself say, and was thoroughly surprised when she realised she actually _did_ believe him. "I was just...surprised, that's all."

Surprised, indeed. Wasn't that just the understatement of the century.

He actually looked briefly surprised himself. "Do you believe so easily?"

She found she rather wondered about that as well, but this was not the time to contemplate such things.

"Northern mythology - it makes sense, in a way," she said, inwardly cursing herself for speaking up in the first place. "More sense than many of the other religions and mythologies, at least."

"Northern _mythology,"_ he said, and the smile on his face was unnerving on a whole new level. "As you might realise, I am no myth." He fixed her with blue eyes, and there was a dangerous glint in them. Not good. Not good at all.

"Since you are so 'knowledgeable' in the subject," he said in a voice dripping with sarcasm, "do you know who _I_ am?"

Her voice was no more than a whisper when she spoke. "God of Mischief, Chaos, and Fire."

He smirked. "Indeed. And what do they say about me?"

"The tales of you are…varied."

"Varied?"

_How the hell did you get yourself into this, honestly,_ she thought as she drew a shivering breath. "Yes. Some good, some bad."

He narrowed his eyes. "And which ones are true, do you think?"

She drew another shivering breath. "All of them - none of them?"

"Playing it safe, I see," he said, and huffed. "Disappointing."

"I just think that the truth is lost to us," she whispered. "One should not look for facts and truth in ancient books."

He looked briefly surprised again before cocking his head, studying her. "And what am I - do you think - now that you look at me?"

She gazed at him for a moment, wondering what the hell to respond. If half of the things she knew was actually true… He was not _evil._ God of Mischief, Chaos, and Fire. None of those things were _evil._ It all depended on the situation. If Loki was anything like the lore said, he was not evil. He was…misunderstood.

And apparently it had taken her less than a minute to develop a severe case of Stockholm syndrome if she already was at the point where she called him 'misunderstood'. She was a walking cliché. Lovely.

She shook her head. "I don't know."

He huffed again. "Mortals. Too much fear to speak the truth. Shame. I am _evil,_ is that is?"

"Chaos is not necessarily evil."

_What's happening to his eyes?_ she thought as she watched his eyes flicker. The _colour_ in his eyes flickered. The intense blue faded for a moment, and she realised his eyes had the same colour as the glowing crystal on the tip of his staff. What did that staff do? It affected him in some way, but exactly _how,_ she couldn't say.

The blue in his eyes faded completely, and for a brief moment - no more than a second - he looked at her with green eyes - green eyes that looked strangely vulnerable.

_"_ _Insolence,"_ he hissed, and before she knew it, the air was knocked out of her by some invisible force, and it sent her flying through the air, landing with a hard thump on the pavement - quite the distance away.

_So much for having doubts about his pure 'evilness,_ she thought as she groaned in pain. The pavement was not a comfortable place to be tossed around on. But it didn't seem as if she had broken anything, thankfully.

"Is not this simpler?" she heard him say, and she realised his focus was on the crowd. She could run - possibly. If she was to run, she had to do it _now._

"Is this not your natural state?" he continued, and she took one final glance, seeing him walk amongst the crowd, as if he owned them.

Amber shuffled up from the pavement, hissing in pain as she heard his voice again. "It's the unspoken truth of humanity, that you crave subjugation. The bright lure of freedom diminishes your life's joy in a mad scramble for power, for identity. You were made to be ruled."

Amber finally managed to convince her body that running was a good idea, and the last thing she heard made her shiver.

_"_ _In the end, you will always kneel."_

Amber ran until it felt as if her lungs would burst, and her foot hurt like hell. Realising she had to rest for a moment, she found a narrow alleyway, and sat down behind a dumpster.

Her mind was spinning. What was happening to the world? _"I am Loki, of Asgard,"_ he had said, and Amber had believed him. Why had she believed him? She didn't quite know, but there was just… _something_ about him, something different. _Very_ different. And that staff-sceptre-thing he was carrying? There was definitely something different about that.

And he had tossed her through the air as if she weighed no more than a bag of chips.

_Why did he do that?_ she thought. _Why did he throw me away when he obviously didn't want anyone to escape?_

Amber didn't understand. But she had a feeling not everything was as it seemed.

**_\- End flashback -_ **

Amber had - like the rest of the population - spent quite some time running around like a headless chicken when the hole in the sky opened, but she had eventually managed to calm herself enough to stop and think.

She had considered her options. She could run and hide, or she could stay and fight.

Amber had chosen the latter. The aliens were not invincible, and although she had no means to harm the spaceships, she could do her part against the aliens on the ground. Not without weapons, though.

She had to get home.

Amber had left the army, even moved away from England because she'd had enough of blood and violence, and needed a change. She had then proceeded to move to New York, just in time for a fucking _alien_ _invasion_. How ironic.

But, considering how she _did_ have quite a lot of experience with blood and violence, Amber would fight. With three years in the army, almost nine months in Afghanistan… Surely she could rough up some aliens.

And so, she had to get home.

Amber had never been happier, or more grateful that she was an annoyingly curious being, something that resulted in her picking up the most random skills whenever she came across something that seemed interesting. Said skills included juggling, practically anything that had to do with a computer, using a slingshot with deadly precision, and hot-wiring a car, or in this case - a motorcycle.

Her favourite random skill was the slingshot. It had all begun with her brother teasing her once upon a time, telling her how she would never be as good as he was. Amber had decided to prove him wrong, and had succeeded brilliantly. So now she could do _quite_ a lot of damage with it, something that had come in handy countless times.

A nurse with a slingshot. She couldn't exactly blame them for underestimating her.

-o-

She had really wanted to just _stay_ home once she got there, but she knew she couldn't. The whole city was in a state of emergency, and everything was basically falling apart. The phone lines were down - or overwhelmed - and the infrastructure was in shambles. Some TV stations were still up and running, but she wondered how long that would last.

She had managed to send a mail to her mum, telling her she was alive, giving a quick explanation of what was happening, and that she was going into the city to do whatever she could to help, because the city needed all the help it could get. She wrote that she had all her military equipment - weapons, armour, medical kit - and that she would try to stay out of the fray as much as possible. She ended by telling how much she loved them all, and that she would contact them again as soon as she was able.

And then, she had ventured out into the chaotic city again, armed and ready for combat - if needed be.

 


	2. Sassy and Sarcastic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2! More aliens! And let me just say: I'm so frustrated with this chapter xD not necessarily because it's terrible, but because I have rewritten it three times. The first two ended up in the 'this would absolutely never-ever-seriously-never-happen category. I hope this one is somewhat plausible, though.
> 
> Also, I'm kinda sick of the aliens. They won't be around for long, thankfully.  
> Anyway! I'll try to not have rambling author's notes in the future. Now, on with the story!  
> Disclaimer (which I forgot in the former chapter) I don't own anything! I'm just playing in Marvel's sandbox. It's a lovely sandbox.
> 
> Oh, and comments make me happy as a clam!

 

-o-

The aliens were squishier than previously thought, something Amber realised when she managed to take down an alien with one well-aimed shot.

Still, though, there were many of them, and she had to be careful. She was alone, and would be in big trouble if faced with more than one of them. Defense was the best offense in this situation.

She managed rather well, though. She moved through the streets as stealthy as possible, taking out aliens one by one when she saw an opening for a well-aimed shot.

She tried her best to help people along the way as well. People were wounded, and she did whatever she could for them before moving on.

-o-

She was running - surprise, surprise - in terror this time. She had narrowly avoided a horde of ruddy aliens, and was now trying her best to not get killed by a stray shot, falling rocks, or something equally idiotic.

The whole 'defense is the best offense' approach had worked out perfectly fine until now, but that came to an abrupt end when she ran through a side street, something that turned out to be a stupid decision.

It was already too late when she heard the screams, and saw the flash of blue light, because just as she realised people were running, she slammed into something solid, and instantly recoiled.

Amber gasped when she realised what she had just done – _who_ she had just run into – and her reaction was to freeze up, which was not a particularly good idea.

The God of Mischief was standing there, and he had the staff-sceptre-thing aimed at her in a flash, making her realise she had no time to run, no time to draw her weapon (not that it would do any good, but it would have made her feel better, if nothing else).

Basically, it was too late, and when a pair of piercing blue eyes fixed on her, Amber knew she was going to die.

But that was when he recognised her. His blue eyes widened, and Amber had no idea what was happening, nor what to do.

"Hello again," she heard herself say, because apparently, for some _inexplicable_ reason, her brain had decided that talking was a good idea. She tended to do this in situations like these. Lovely.

"So," she continued, inwardly yelling at herself for being this idiotic, and for not being able to stop herself. "Do you come here often?"

Oh god, what was she doing? What the _hell_ was she doing? If there had been a slight chance of surviving this, it was surely gone now.

Loki stared at her for another long moment, obviously surprised by the development of this situation. So was Amber, quite frankly.

The surprise in his expression vanished, and Amber realised he was looking slightly amused. The amusement faded quickly as well, however, and his expression turned dark.

Yup, she was going to die.

But then, something changed. Something major. She sucked in a breath as she watched him squeeze his eyes shut for a moment before opening them again.

Green eyes met hers, and he spoke through clenched teeth.

_"Run."_

She ran.

-o-

Amber ran until she was out of breath, and then she hid, because she _really_ needed to gather her thoughts.

He had done it again. He had let her run. Why? _Why_ would he let her run? From the bits and pieces of information she had heard, Loki was the one who was running the show. _He_ was the one controlling the alien invasion, fully intent on taking over the world, apparently.

So why did he allow her to run? Not just once, but _twice_ now. It made no sense whatsoever. And the whole blue-eyes-green-eyes thing…there was something terribly wrong there.

Generally, everything was terribly wrong, because alien invasions sucked. Big time. Amber just hoped it would end soon. With the aliens as the losing team, preferably.

She wondered what would happen if the aliens _won_. Nothing good - she was _quite_ certain about that. And what of Loki? What would he do if he managed to win? Declare himself 'King of the World'?

Well, it would be 'King of New York' at first. Not nearly as epic. It really had more of a Frank Sinatra-feel to it.

That was when she realised...he would never win, now would he? The attack on New York had come more or less completely out of the blue – literally out of the blue - and the city had been quite unprepared for the hole that opened in the sky, and the alien invasion that followed.

And yet - the aliens had not won – Loki had not won – even with the advantage of catching their enemy off guard. It didn't necessarily mean they _wouldn't_ win, but New York was just one city. How could they achieve world domination if they couldn't manage one city?

Even if they did take New York, the rest of the world would be ready to fight by time they were finished here. If the aliens were to succeed – if Loki was to succeed – they would have to do better than this. They would need _quite_ the army, and if they should somehow manage to actually take over the world, said army needed to stay on earth afterwards. Humankind would not succumb easily. And they would never accept permanent defeat. There would be resistance _everywhere._

And at some point – perhaps even soon – someone would bring out the big guns. Atomic bombs.

Humankind would destroy themselves and the world they lived in before they bowed down and gave up their free will.

Amber remembered Loki's little speech. _"Is not this simpler? Is this not your natural state? It's the unspoken truth of humanity, that you crave subjugation. The bright lure of freedom diminishes your life's joy in a mad scramble for power, for identity. You were made to be ruled. In the end, you will always kneel."_

He had no idea of how terribly wrong he was. Or had he? The more she thought about it, the more she felt as if something was off. Loki was supposed to be clever, wasn't he? He was the god of mischief – the trickster – and was supposed to be cunning, clever – always with a trick up his sleeve. Generally, he was supposed to be good at what he did. Every move he made was deliberate, always an agenda behind everything, always looking for a way to exploit the situation, or gain something, somehow.

So what was he doing, really? Because if he was the mastermind behind the scenes, what was he doing?

'King of the World'. It was naïve, really, to think that this was something he could achieve. She couldn't quite believe that Loki was naïve. He wouldn't make a very good trickster god if he was.

He could have underestimated humankind - that was a possible explanation. But underestimated them to _that_ degree? That didn't sit well with her either.

If he was to pull off 'King of the World', he had to have one hell of a trick up his sleeve.

And if he didn't... Then there was something else going on, something major, most likely.

And she had a feeling it had something to do with that blue, glowing crystal.

-o-

She really had to stop running around in this particular area, because this was apparently Loki's area of choice as well, something she realised when she turned a corner, finding herself looking at the God of Mischief. The Severely Displeased God of Mischief, apparently.

"You shall aid me!"

The Severely Displeased God of Mischief was holding a man by the front of his shirt, and the man was obviously terrified. Which was the only rational response to his current predicament, quite frankly.

"I just work here," the man said in a shaky voice. "I can't enter the vault. The boss is the only one who can."

"The relic is not for you to keep!" Loki hissed, shaking the man a bit. "It was stolen, centuries ago! I shall reclaim it!"

"I just work here, man."

"Then you are useless to me," Loki drawled, and Amber watched as he raised the sceptre.

Amber reacted without thinking, and ran toward them. "No!"

Loki had the sceptre aimed at her within a second, and Amber froze, holding her hands up to show she wasn't armed.

"Please just let me go!"

Jesus, this man did not know when to shut up, because Loki's eyes narrowed in anger.

"Please, I have kids, man!"

Okay, so Amber had not expected Loki to react as he did. Because for just a brief moment, Loki's eyes widened, and then his expression hardened again. She decided this was the time to act.

"Let him go, and take me instead."

Loki narrowed his eyes as if he was trying to figure out what her agenda was. "Why would I do that when I could merely kill this man, and take you anyway?"

Amber was pretty sure her heart was about to beat its way _out_ of her chest, but managed to open her mouth and speak. "Because if you do, I'll come willingly."

And if that wasn't just the most idiotic thing she had said in her entire life, she didn't know what was. She _really_ didn't want to 'willingly' wander off into whatever it was - a museum, she realised - with the Angry God of Mischief. But if the man had kids... Amber didn't have any kids. And maybe, just _maybe,_ she could survive this. Somehow.

Loki seemed to consider this for a moment, and then he released the grip on the man's shirt, pushing him away. "Run, if you know what is good for you."

The man didn't even glance at Amber, and she fought the urge to shout 'how about a thank you, asshole' as she watched him run. Well, if he had kids…

 _He better have kids, the prick,_ she thought just as Loki grabbed her by the arm.

"Come."

-o-

As they walked through the museum, Amber wondered what the hell she had gotten herself into, and if she actually could do whatever it was needed doing. What information did she have so far? A stolen relic, apparently located in a vault that only the boss could enter. Her mind filled with images from old movies, the ones where they used a stethoscope while turning the lock, listening for those small clicks when they hit the right numbers.

Well, if that was the case here, she was screwed. Hopefully that wasn't the case. She pictured herself with a stethoscope, twisting the lock in desperation while pretending to know what she was doing. The image in her mind was in a sepia kind of colour, and she almost chuckled. She probably would have, if not for the fact that the God of Chaos was walking next to her with a grim expression on his face.

"So, you need to get into the vault?"

He didn't even look at her. "Yes."

She fought the urge to say 'well, that's great! I totally have _all_ the information I need now, thanks, Loki', and succeeded in _not_ saying that, thankfully.

Why did she always do this? Why did her brain kick into 'sass and sarcasm' mode whenever she found herself in mortal peril? This was always how she reacted. Just as when she had asked the bloody _God of Mischief, Fire and Chaos_ 'so, do you come here often?'

Her brain clearly had a death wish.

Although, it wasn't always a bad thing. Like the time she had been on her way home from work, and had been mugged. He had _attempted_ to mug her, anyway.

She was working as an intern at a hospital at the time, and walked home, still wearing her scrubs because she had been too tired to change. She had been so tired that taking a shortcut through a dark and ominous alleyway had seemed like an excellent idea at the time.

She had been ambushed halfway through, because _of course_ that had to happen, and had suddenly found herself cornered behind a dumpster by a man holding a knife.

The man had taken one look at her, and then laughed – brown teeth and all – before commenting on her lovely outfit, something she had thanked him for, and then told him 'a girl gotta look her best, you know'. He had laughed again, and tension had left his body, obviously seeing her as no threat at all.

After exchanging quips for a minute or two, the man had asked 'where's your wallet, sweetheart?', and she had told him truthfully that it was in her backpack. This was of course where he should have told her to actually _give_ him her backpack, but he didn't. Instead, he gestured with his knife, telling her to 'be a darling and fetch it for me, will you?'

She had placed her backpack on the ground, opened it, and had of course not fetched her wallet. Instead, she had fetched a couple of marble-sized steel ball bearings, sent a silent thank you to her brother for being such a smug bastard once upon a time, and grabbed her slingshot. She had pulled back the latex band while moving to an upright position, and aimed directly at his face.

'If you move, I shoot,' she had told him while looking at him with cold eyes. 'And believe me when I say that you really don't want me to shoot.'

He had managed a forced laugh, asking her if she wasn't a little too old for toys, and she had given him a wicked smile and told him that 'I hunt deer with this exact slingshot. And believe me, I have killed deer with one shot from longer distances than this.

Well, it had been only that one time, and the shot had been more a strike of luck than anything else, but he didn't have to know that. It had also been the only time she had tried to hunt deer with a slingshot - or hunt at all, for that matter. She could buy meat at the grocery store. She didn't need to roam the forest in pursuit of Bambi's mum.

'Walk,' she had told him, and he had obliged. They had exited the alleyway, and Amber had been beyond relieved when there were actual people in the street. 'Excuse me, sir, but could you call the police?' she had asked a man passing by, and he had looked at her with wide eyes as he took in the situation.

A nurse with a slingshot, and a man with a knife. The man had probably realised what had happened, and even if he didn't - it was probably best to call the police anyway.

The sassy nurse with a slingshot. Yeah, people tended to underestimate her, and she couldn't really blame them.

-o-

They eventually reached the 'vault'. It was more of a rather sturdy metal door than the 'bank heist in sepia' thing she had pictured in her mind.

"Have you tried just blowing it up?" she heard herself ask. Great. Give the God of Mischief some tips, why don't you?

He gave her a look that told her exactly how much of an imbecile she was. "I know not _where_ the relic is located. I would rather avoid destroying it."

"Ah. Yeah. Wouldn't want that," she said while mentally rolling her eyes at herself. She smiled nervously before turning her focus on the door. "It's a codelock."

"Is it, really? Well thank you kindly for informing me."

His voice was dripping with sarcasm, something that amused her in an 'I am terrified beyond belief' way.

"No problem," she quipped, and immediately wanted to slap herself. She should really stop getting sassy with the Norse god. Pretending like she hadn't just been all sarcastic, she continued. "If the director is the only one with the code, we should probably go to his office."

He huffed, but gestured for her to walk, and so she did.

She glanced at him while they walked "What if I can't help you?"

He gave her a dark look. "You have already sacrificed yourself in an oh-so-noble way for a man you do not know, and I suspect you would do the same again. If you will not aid me, I _shall_ find someone who will. No matter what it takes."

She took a deep breath before speaking again. "I see. But…just tell me this - I know it won't change anything, but I would still like to know - is the relic something that will get a whole lot of people killed? I would like to know if the last thing I do in life is help the war effort - on the wrong side."

He raised an eyebrow. "And what if it is?"

Shrugging, she sighed. "Well, that would suck."

She could swear he looked amused, even if briefly. "That would _suck?"_

She shrugged again. "Yes. I am guessing you will get your hands on this thing - if not with my help, then someone else's. So I will help you get it. If I can. If this is something harmful that will get people killed… Well, at least I can spare the lives of those you 'recruit' to aid you." She paused for a moment. "So…is it?"

He raised an eyebrow again. "It is not."

For some reason, she believed him.

"All right, that's something, at least," she said just as they reached the director's office.

The door was locked, but Loki made quick work of it, practically shattering the lock with a flick of a hand.

They entered the office – a huge room, actually – and Amber moved toward the desk.

He stopped her by grabbing her arm. "Not so fast."

She stopped to look at him. "What?"

"How many weapons do you have on you, exactly?"

"Oh," she said, giving him a somewhat sheepish look. "A couple. I have weapons and medical supplies in my backpack, and on me."

He merely raised an eyebrow, and she just went ahead and shrugged off her backpack and jacket, placing them on a table next to her.

She was surprised when he actually picked up her jacket, where he of course found her gun, her knife, and then her slingshot - the latter made him give her a questioning look.

She raised an eyebrow. "What would you do if I came toward you with a slingshot?"

He smirked. "I would laugh."

She nodded. "People usually do that - right up to the point where they may or may not have a metal marble lodged in their brain."

His eyes widened in surprise as he looked at the slingshot, then back at her, and then there was an amused glimmer in his eyes.

"I see," he said, and put the slingshot with the rest of the items he had found. "Anything else I should know?"

She was standing there in her jeans and t shirt, and it was pretty clear that she didn't have any other weapons on her, so he made a dismissive gesture, and she moved over to the desk.

She sat down, turned on the computer, and rolled her eyes when the thing went directly to the desktop.

"Seriously?" she muttered. "No password?"

Loki came to stand behind her, something that wasn't just a little distracting. _Very_ distracting, in fact.

"Let me just compliment you on your ability to intimidate me merely by standing upright," she said without looking at him. "Consider me impressed."

She was glad that he didn't see her face when she heard him chuckle. She made the God of Chaos laugh. Someone would come in any second now, to give her an award for 'most hilarious person in the entire world'. Also, she should consider a carrier in standup comedy.

It had the hoped effect, thankfully. The God of Mischief came to stand next to her instead of looming over her, which was slightly less intimidating, if nothing else.

After clicking around a bit, she found what she was looking for. "They have a form of intranet. Let's hope it's _really_ advanced."

He was silent, and she glanced at him, finding him looking at her with a rather jaded expression.

Right. God. Not from around here.

"It connects all the computers around here," she said, not looking at him. "And hopefully the security measures."

"I see."

She rolled her eyes. "Jesus Christ," she muttered. "Internet Explorer."

"Is there a problem?"

She glanced at him, wide-eyed. "Oh. No. It's just…" She paused to gesture at the monitor. "I disapprove of their methods, and think they are all morons."

There was an amused glint in his eyes, proving yet again that Amber should consider a carrier in standup comedy.

"I need to get past the asterisks," she said to herself before looking at him. "Well, if the internet is still up and running, I'll have this thing done in a jiffy."

He gave her another jaded look. "You will have this done 'in a jiffy'."

Right. That whole 'not from around here'. She needed to remember that.

"I'll have this done…really fast," she said, lamely, before turning to the computer again.

-o-

"Hah," she said a while later, giving the monitor (and the list of passwords) a smug look. "In your face, museum's director."

"Why do I get the feeling you are rather enjoying yourself?"

Amber gave Loki a puzzled look, but then realised what she had just said. Who was she kidding – she _was_ enjoying herself. She loved these kinds of challenges, and she may or may not have briefly forgotten about the whole 'mortal peril' thing.

She awkwardly pointed at the monitor. "I – well – I like puzzles."

He crossed his arms over his chest, shifted so his hip rested on the edge of the desk, and cocked his head. "Why are you not afraid?" he asked, and he was gazing at her in a way that made her want to squirm.

She laughed a little shakily. "Oh, I am. Terrified. I know the chances of me getting out of this alive are slim, so of course I'm terrified. I don't _want_ to die, after all."

There was something in his eyes then, a flicker – and a responding flicker of hope in her.

She turned to the computer, looking at the passwords. "Oh, Jesus, really?"

"What?"

The museum's director is actually a moron. His password is 'CarlaSophie7982'."

"Why does that make him a moron?"

Amber raised an eyebrow. "He should have used random numbers and letters. Instead, he uses CarlaSophie, which is probably his two daughters, and 7982, which is probably their birth years. If I had done some googling – searching, I mean – I could have just bloody _guessed_ it. It's typical. People don't remember their passwords, so they use names of loved ones, and important dates."

He glanced at the monitor before looking at her again. "Sentiment."

She nodded. "Exactly. This is why I could have _guessed_ the 'top secret' passwords – the same passwords that allows me to change the code to the room of 'this is where we keep all our fragile, irreplaceable items'. All this because of sentiment. Ridiculous, isn't it?"

He was silent for a bit. "You find sentiment ridiculous?"

She shook her head. "Not at all. But there's a difference between sentiment and stupidity. Everything has its place, and adding sentiment to security is...stupidity." He just gazed at her, and she tried not to squirm as she turned to the computer again.

After successfully changing the code to the door, she smiled – God knows why, because successfully accomplishing this meant impending doom and probably death for her. "There we go."

He nodded, and she followed him to the not-at-all-secure-door, she typed the code, and the door clicked open.

He just stood there for a moment with his hand on the door handle, and Amber tried to remember how to breathe. Also – she tried to convince herself that death was probably completely painless, and she would be just fine.

But then, he turned to look at her, and she inhaled sharply when she saw his eyes. Green. They were green.

"You have precisely three minutes to get as far away from me as possible."

She stared at him for a moment, and then she did something – she didn't know why – she put a hand on his arm. "It is going to be all right," she said, not knowing why the hell she would say such a thing, and then she ran. First to the director's office to grab her things, and then away from the museum, away from him – to freedom.

 


	3. I'm Just Cooking Spaghetti

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3! This chapter was much more fun to write xD I love writing from Loki's point of view.  
> I'll be so happy if you leave me a comment! (No, seriously. I'm ridiculously worried that you don't like it.)  
> Anyway, this chapter was fun to write, so I hope you like it!  
> Disclaimer: I don't own anything!

 

 

 

-o-

She was exhausted. She was exhausted, but it was over. The Avengers – flashy name – had defeated the evil aliens, sealed the hole in the sky, and the only thing remaining was locating Loki. He was still on the run. She had seen news reports – Thor had been holding the bloody sceptre, so that was something, at least.

But Loki was gone. Worrying, to say the least. But then again, if he was found, he would be executed, from what she understood. No one had said it directly, but it was there, between the lines. She didn't quite know how to feel about that.

She didn't quite know how to feel about any of it, quite frankly. And when she found a certain God of Mischief outside her door three days later, she had absolutely _no_ idea what to feel about _anything._

-o-

It was Friday night, and she was ready for a relaxing night in the sofa with glass of wine, a book, and generally the things that made life worth living, but then there was a knock on the door.

Strange, people usually used the doorbell. Not to mention they used to use the doorbell _outside._ It had to be one of her neighbours. She walked over to the door, and looked through the peephole.

And froze.

_What?_ she thought. _That can't be right. It just can't._

She couldn't have the God of Mischief standing outside her door. She was seeing things, surely.

She opened the door, still with a look of utter disbelief on her face.

"Good evening," the God of Mischief drawled.

_"_ _Good evening?"_ she replied.

"It is, is it not? Evening?"

She was about to reply – basically say 'what the actual fuck' in ten different ways, but then she heard a door open down the hall, and grabbed the arm of the God of Mischief, pulling him inside.

She slammed the door shut, and let go of him, finding him standing there with a look of utter displeasure over being mandhandled in such a way.

"Mrs Williams is the most curious being in New York, I'm sure of it," she said, gesturing at the door. "And she would have put up quite the fuss if she saw you." He just looked at her, so she shook her head. "What are you doing here? I mean – what the _hell_ are you doing here?"

He raised an eyebrow. "Hiding, obviously."

She flung her hands in the air. "Obviously."

He actually snickered. "See? Not that difficult to figure out, now is it?"

She shook her head before looking at him. He had green eyes. Not a hint of blue. And he looked...tired. Exhausted, more like it.

"How did you find me?"

He produced something from his pocket - her wallet, she realised. "You happened to leave this."

"Oh," she said, shaking her head again. "So, you are hiding. Does that involve me getting murdered?"

"That is not my current agenda, no."

She exhaled in relief. "Well, then. That's something, at least. Would you like a glass of wine?"

"Pardon?"

She rolled her eyes. "I was having a perfect Friday night - wine, book, comfortable sofa, no aliens trying to kill me - until you showed up. And now I _definitely_ need that wine. So, would you like a glass of wine?"

"Are you not going to 'alert the authorities' as they say?"

"I'm exhausted, and I'm not particularly fond of the death penalty," she said, turned around, and walked back into the living room.

She walked into the kitchen, standing behind the kitchen island to open another bottle of wine when he entered the living room. She watched him from the corner of her eye as he looked around - apparently, her flat was utterly fascinating, and she found it rather amusing, to say the least.

"Do you prefer red or white wine?"

He looked at her. "Red."

She gave him a small smile and opened the bottle of red wine. "Me too. Mostly."

"Mostly?"

"Sometimes I rather prefer purple drinks with tiny umbrellas in them."

"Pardon?"

She shook her head. "Never mind. Red wine it is."

She grabbed the bottle and two glasses before trailing over to the huge sofa, put the glasses and the wine on the table, and sat down.

"Are you not going to ask questions?"

"Of course I am," she said, rolling her eyes. "But for now, all I ask is that you do not sit down in the sofa wearing that cape and leather armour – thing – whatever you call it. It has a whole lot of dust and blood on it."

He looked almost perplexed – a combination of outrage, confusion, and amusement. Amusement won in the end, and he gracefully removed the cloak, the leather armour, and eventually, he was standing there, wearing a very snug pair of leather trousers, and an extremely stylish green tunic, with black and golden embroideries.

"Thank you," she said, nodding at the empty glass on the table. "Would you like to sit down?"

He sat down, and she poured wine into the glass – he eyed the glass with suspicion. She rolled her eyes.

"What, do you think I would try to poison you?" He raised an eyebrow, and she rolled her eyes again. "I'm not. I hear they say poison is a woman's weapon of choice, but I like a more direct approach, should the situation demand it. And I suspect the only thing I would achieve is to annoy you – something I'd rather not do. Then there is the fact that it would be a much better idea to just 'alert the authorities' as you say. I could have done that in ten different ways since you walked in the door, after all." She paused. "What are you doing here? _Here,_ I mean?"

"Yes, because my options were practically endless," he quipped as he picked up the glass, eyeing the content doubtfully.

She wanted to say 'well, you could just hide somewhere where there weren't any people, or generally not _here'_ but something made her hold her tongue.

"Tell me what the sceptre does," she said instead, and ignored his surprised look. "Your eyes are green now, it's not very difficult to figure out that the sceptre did something to you."

"Many would disagree with you – including my so-called brother."

"Well, luckily they aren't currently here to disagree with me. What I need to know – and I don't want the entire story, because I don't think you are very keen on telling me, but I would like the core subject – did you try to take over the world purely based on your own opinions? Or did that sceptre have a puppeteer in the other end?"

He looked angry now. "Do you insinuate that I am a puppet?"

She shrugged. She was just too tired to walk on eggshells. "I don't know – are you?"

"No," he said, giving her a dark look. But then, he looked away. "Not any longer."

She almost exhaled in relief. So there _had_ been something more involved than just Loki's desire to take over the world.

"All right," she said, sighing. "One more thing – would you do it again?"

He turned to look at her – gazing at her for a long moment. "No," he eventually said.

-o-

After an hour or so with careful prodding, she had put the pieces together – as well as she could.

Loki – before arriving on earth – was…traumatized. She didn't know how to put it. Something had happened – something bad – and he was basically out of his mind. He hadn't told her any of this, but it wasn't hard to figure out. Something bad had happened, and that was when he had been given that sceptre. Then he arrived on earth, and the rest was history.

And now, he was on the run – green eyes and all – and he had come to _her,_ for some inexplicable reason.

She didn't know what to do. She couldn't make herself call the authorities. They would execute him, or he would be sent to Asgard, where he would be executed. He would just generally be executed. At least that seemed very likely. And Amber realised she couldn't be the one to cause that. 

_I suppose I'll just…let him stay,_ she thought. _Until I figure out what to do._

"All right," she said, and he gave her a confused look. "The whole 'hiding' thing? All right."

"Many would question your sanity at this point, I believe," he said, giving her a surprised look.

"Indeed," she quipped. "Including myself."

He actually looked amused, and she couldn't help the amused look she gave him in return.

"I'm starving," she said out of the blue. "Are you hungry?"

His face said 'yes, but I'm not about to admit that', so she shrugged, and got up from the sofa, heading for the kitchen.

-o-

She had been roaming around the kitchen for a few minutes, and was in the process of measuring spaghetti when he entered. She had spent those few minutes contemplating what to do, and eventually realised she was too tired to put up an act. Murder was not on his current agenda, and even if it was… Well, she would probably regret not alerting the authorities. But then again, she would probably not have a lot of time to regret anything, considering how she would be dead and all.

She was generally too tired to put up an act, so she focused on the spaghetti instead.

"Shame that I'm a menace in the kitchen," she said while looking at the spaghetti with narrow eyes. "I never get this right."

"What is that?"

The God of Mischief didn't know what spaghetti was. And if that wasn't just utterly hilarious, she didn't know what was. Not that she was about to tell him.

"Spaghetti. I tend to make enough for half a person - or ten people. There is no in-between." She studied the spaghetti for a moment. "This is probably enough, though. Or too much. Who knows."

She put the spaghetti in the casserole, poured water on it, and hummed as she proceeded to roam the cupboards for spices.

"I'm making spaghetti and meatballs. Sounds utterly delicious, doesn't it?" She looked at him, and laughed when she saw his frown. "I know. It sounds somewhat gross. It really isn't, though. And it's one of the few things I'm able to make without burning the kitchen to the ground."

He just watched her with amused eyes, and she smirked as she found the ground beef in the fridge.

She put the ground beef in a bowl, and was about to add some spice when she changed her mind.

"You should perhaps get a say in this," she said, and walked over to him with the spices, holding them up to him. "Does this smell nice?"

-o-

Loki looked at the strange creature in front of him. What had she just said? Does this smell nice?

"This one," he said after smelling the offered spices. This was ridiculous. Nothing had gone as intended this evening. He had intended to show up, demand that she obliged to whatever he said – because or else – and she would reluctantly agree, but ask no questions.

Well, that didn't happen, now did it? It had all gone awry the moment she manhandled him inside and slammed the door shut behind him.

She wasn't supposed to do that - to react like that. She wasn't supposed to just _accept_ him showing up here, nor was she supposed to ask questions. And he was _most certainly_ not supposed to _answer_ said questions.

And yet, he had. Her careful prodding had resulted in him sharing much more than intended.

She hadn't asked the questions he would have expected - why didn't he just hide away somewhere alone, or why did he come to _her,_ of all people? She had just accepted his 'I didn't have many options' explanation. Foolish, naïve human. Except…she wasn't. She wasn't naïve. Her questioning of him had been so perfectly executed that he couldn't have done it better himself. She had managed to get the information she needed without making him angry. Without touching too sensitive subjects. She was rather brilliant, in a way. For a _human_ , that was.

Said rather brilliant human was currently humming. _Humming._ As if this was completely normal, and she wasn't harboring the most wanted criminal in the world.

If she had prodded more – asked him why he had come to her – he didn't know if he would be able to answer. He was losing his mind from being alone. He had finally managed to get free of that bloody sceptre, and then he had managed to escape before they caught him – he had even shielded himself from Heimdall.

And then, he had run around like a husk in the shadows, for three days. Restless, angry, exhausted – broken. He felt broken. And so alone.

And then, he had found her wallet – he had kept it, for some reason – and there he had found her name, her address – before he knew what he was doing, he found himself in front of her door.

He had prepared for quite a lot of different scenarios to what would happen when she opened the door, but being manhandled inside because 'Mrs Williams will make a fuss' was not one of them. Her first instinct was to hide him, and he didn't understand it at all.

_"I'm not particularly fond of the death penalty."_

That had been her explanation. It was naïve. But she was not naïve. He had come across her many enough times to realise this.

_"Oh, I am. Terrified. I know the chances of me getting out of this alive are slim, so of course I'm terrified. I don't want to die, after all,"_ she had replied in the museum, when he asked her why she was not afraid. She was not naïve.

Shrugging off his thoughts because they were getting rather gloomy, he opted to watch the humming female in the kitchen.

"Oh sweet Merlin," she said, and he had to stifle a laugh. "I didn't mean to cook spaghetti for twenty people." Shaking her head, she moved over to the cupboard, getting a frying pan – still humming when she flicked a tad of butter into it. Suddenly, she turned around to look at him. "Would you like to shower or something? Not that I think you _need_ to shower, it's just that I spent like an hour in the shower when I got back three days ago. It was rather nice."

Thankfully, he knew what a shower was. And yes. He _truly_ wanted to shower. _Desperately,_ in fact.

"That would be…acceptable," he said, instantly feeling like a moron. But he was so tired. So endlessly, painfully tired. and she just smiled.

She just shrugged, like this was nothing out of the ordinary whatsoever.  "I don't blame you," she said, giving him a small smile. "I'll show you the bathroom and whatnot."

-o-

A little while later, he found himself in the shower, shaking his head at the surrealism of it all.

Outside of the shower – waiting for him – towels, of course, but not only towels. Clothes. _Clothes._ Clothes he was willing to bloody well wear. A black shirt with a high collar, and black trousers – surprisingly shapely. Even underwear. He didn't quite know how to feel about 'boxers', but very well. He was practically covered in dirt, grime, and blood, so clean clothes seemed like heaven at this point.

'It was supposed to be a gift for my brother,' she had explained when he asked about why in the world she had male clothing lying around – he had felt like a fool the moment he asked. She might just have a – what did they call it? Boyfriend? Something like that.

He hadn't even thought about that. He had panicked there for a moment, because perhaps this 'boyfriend' would show up at any point. But no. The clothes were for her brother. This did not mean she didn't have a 'boyfriend', however.

_What are you doing?_ he thought as he plucked a colourful bottle of something from a shelf – it smelled strawberries, and he quickly put it back, finding a more neutral soap instead. _She is probably calling the authorities in this moment._

He hadn't thought about that either, and the thought made his blood go cold. By the nine realms, why hadn't he thought about that? He just assumed she wouldn't do anything of the kind, because she said so. Of course that had to be a lie. Her whole act had to be, well, an act.

He had – for some insane reason – assumed that he would shower, put on these ridiculous clothes, and then walk back out, and find her in the kitchen, just as before. That wouldn't happen, now would it? If she was right in her mind, she was alerting someone of his presence.

He was not thinking clearly, that much was certain.

He quickly finished the shower, and hesitated for a moment before putting on the clothes she had found for him. He couldn't bear the thought of putting on the bloody, filthy clothes he had been wearing for something that felt like an eternity. 

Taking a deep breath, he shook his head, and carefully opened the door.

Well, her home was not filled with government, that was something. But he could hear her voice. She was talking to someone. He had seen people use small, square things, and they were apparently communication devices.

His heart sank. How could he be so foolish?

"No, no," he heard her say, "it's fine. I'm just cooking spaghetti."

Was she talking to the authorities about cooking spaghetti? He didn't exactly think they would find that topic to be even remotely relevant. This woman made no sense. None whatsoever.

"How was your day, sweetheart?"

She wasn't talking to the authorities, apparently. She was probably talking to her boyfriend. Said boyfriend was probably already informed about his presence.

"I'm sorry to hear that. I would throttle them all, had I only been there. Yes, I miss you too, dearest." There was a pause. "Of course I would throttle them all, you are my sister. I would go to hell and back for you, sis. Yes. Yes, I know I am ridiculous. Deal with it."

She was talking to her sister?

"Like I said, I am cooking spaghetti. No, I am alone, why?" He heard her laugh. "Yes, I am actually cooking a meal only for myself. Spaghetti and meatballs. Mhm, I know – but you know, I would put fire to the kitchen if I tried anything else."

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Not only was there no police here, she was actually lying – saying she was alone. What was wrong with this woman?

"Yes, I love you too, sis," she said, and he could hear the soft warmth in her voice. "Say hi to mum from me. Bye."

There was a pause, and then he heard that infernal humming again.

She seemed so…unfazed by his presence. Nothing of this made any sense.

-o-

Amber heard the bathroom door open, and close again. Loki, the God of Chaos and Mischief was done showering. It almost made her laugh out loud.

She didn't understand why she was so relaxed about the whole thing. She should be - well - terrified. Or something. And here she was, cooking spaghetti, not terrified at all. She had just been through days and days of constant fear though. Fear on a whole new level. Maybe she had simply spent all her fear, leaving her unable to be afraid.

That, or maybe the alien invasion had completely destroyed every shred of sanity, and she was now clinically insane without realising.

She should have called the police when he was in the shower. But she hadn't even considered it. She was an idiot, apparently, because sane people did not act like this when a person who tried to take over the world just a few days ago showed up.

One did absolutely not cook spaghetti and meatballs for such a person.

_The spaghetti you are currently making begs to differ,_ she thought, and shook her head. Clinically insane seemed increasingly legit.

-o-

Loki had gone back to the bathroom and opened and closed the door, feeling once again like a fool. He proceeded to walk back to the kitchen, hesitantly, and found her there, just like he had foolishly assumed.

"They suit you," she said, and he realised she was talking about his clothing. "I'm glad."

_And ridiculous,_ he thought.  _You are glad ridiculous. This is all ridiculous._

"I have every intention of eating in the living room, unless you greatly oppose of it."

Did he greatly oppose eating in the living room? He had no idea.

"People usually eat by a dining table, but I kind of hate that, and I'm much too fond of my living room to eat at the dining table. I don't even know _why_ I have a dining table."

Loki didn't know anything about anything at this point, so when she walked past him, he merely followed.

-o-

He didn't understand how this had happened, but later that evening, he found himself sitting on a soft bed, with instructions of letting her know if he needed anything.

The spaghetti had actually tasted rather nice, the foolish woman was undeniably amusing, and she hadn't asked any further questions. She needed to 'sleep on everything' apparently, whatever that meant.

And so, here he was, in a bedroom, sitting on a soft bed, and she had just hummed herself out of the room after waving and saying goodnight and 'please don't kill me in my sleep, I will be very upset if you do.'

He couldn't help the snort of laughter he had let out.

The world didn't make sense any longer.

 


	4. A Regular Breakfast Item

-o-

He woke up, and his mind instantly filled with terror. Where was he? The room was dark, and he couldn't quite wrap his sleep-addled mind around - well - anything.

Had that really happened? Had he honestly showed up at her door just to be manhandled inside?

Yes. Yes, that had happened, and it had not been one of the possible outcomes he had considered.

He hesitantly got up, and did his best to look presentable before carefully opening the door.

Well, there was no immediate attack - that was something.

Then he heard humming again. Did the infernal woman never desist her humming? Apparently not.

He carefully closed the door, and walked quietly toward the kitchen, where he found the source of the humming.

She was cooking, apparently. Cooking, humming, and drumming the kitchen utensils on the counter.

She was generally all too cheerful, considering her current predicament. Yes, he realised it was a predicament for her as well, not that it mattered.

_Why are you here?_ He asked himself. He shouldn't be here. It was not safe. He should be somewhere else - anywhere else - not in the kitchen of a humming human female.

Ridiculous.

He considered merely taking his belongings and leave, but the thought filled him with dread.

He was losing his mind, apparently.

_You lost your mind long ago,_ he thought. _When you fell._

That had been the first step toward the state of mind he was currently sporting. He had thought he would die - just let go, and die - that had been what he wanted.

And then, that did not happen. Not at all. Instead, he had kept falling, endlessly, until he hadn't known what was up and what was down - how much time had passed, and if he would ever stop falling.

His mind had begun the descent into madness, then.

And then - he did not know how much time had passed, it could be a millennia, for all he knew - a voice had reached him, offered to save him, if only he would do something in return.

Loki had not hesitated. He still did not hesitate it, because the thought of still falling...he could not bear it.

And that was why he was here, if he was to be honest. He had been alone when he fell - so alone, waiting for death that never came - and then he had been alone - or so it felt - running around causing death and destruction, and then, he had hid for three days - still alone.

And so, here he was. Here, where he was not alone.

Even if she was humming.

Sentiment. He had to stop this nonsense.

He was interrupted by a rather undignified squeak as she noticed him.

"Merlin, you scared me," he breathed, and bent down to pick up the - whatever it was - she had dropped to the floor.

"No, really? I couldn't tell."

She gazed at him for a moment. "Did you wake up on the sarcastic side of the bed today? I will have that bed fixed immediately if that turns out to be a problem."

He had to look at her for a moment. Was she genuinely angry? No, he realised as he saw the flicker of amusement in her eyes.

"Perhaps you should take a closer look at your own bed," he said, raising an eyebrow.

She laughed as she put the - whatever it was - in the sink. "Perhaps. So you like pancakes?"

He wanted to growl at the woman, because she kept asking him questions he did not know the answer to. Did he like 'pancakes'? However would he know?

"Well, I do," she continued without waiting for an answer. "Especially with Nutella. Or sugar and bacon. Or both."

He knew not what Nutella was, but at least bacon and sugar were familiar phrases to him, and he inwardly sighed in relief.

-o-

After a whole lot of shuffling around the kitchen, and even more humming, the woman finally seemed pleased with the result, and gestured at the table. "Hungry?"

He was, in fact, hungry, but not even that could he make himself say. He opted for merely sitting down at the table, gazing curiously at the things unfamiliar to him.

"Here, try this - on that."

He looked at what she gestured at. A glass jar with something chocolaty in it, and then there was - so that was a pancake. All right. Perhaps he could make it through this without looking like a fool.

"Although I understand the skepticism - I would suggest giving it a try."

When he merely raised an eyebrow, she chuckled - the insolence of this human - and turned her focus on the food.

This allowed him to observe, and eventually he did try the 'Nutella' on a pancake.

He was not about to admit that the taste was heavenly - even if it was. Not was he about to admit that he hoped pancakes were a regular breakfast item - even if he did.

-o-

She was certain he would murder her if he knew what she was thinking.

The God of Mischief was adorable. Utterly adorable. It was apparent that half of the things on the kitchen table were unfamiliar to him, and that he was trying to hide it. He was actually rather successful in his effort, but the blank face gave him away.

It was actually possible to read Loki - at times, anyway. His face smoothed over, leaving no expression at all. If only he knew how much of a tell that was. The level of 'emotionless' when he looked at the pancake on his plate was just bloody amusing.

Not that she was going to point that out - ever.

She had watched him from the corner of her eye when he tried the pancake with Nutella.

His eyes had widened - just barely - and then he had chewed, ever so slowly. Apparently, the God of Mischief loved pancakes with Nutella. Well, she would just have to make pancakes a regular breakfast thing, then.

'A regular breakfast thing'. How long would he be staying? She had no idea.

_What am I supposed to do?_ she thought, and inwardly sighed.

-o-

She was washing dishes a while later when her phone rang. Loki was in 'his' room, so she decided to answer when she saw it was Allen - a friend from school.

"Hey! Sec, let me put you on speaker," she poked with a finger, leaving a drop of water on the phone. "There. Sorry, I'm doing dishes. What's up? Oh god, are you all right?"

_"I'm fine, Amber, thank you. I stayed indoors. The aliens never reached my house. What about you?"_

She shrugged, even if he couldn't see it. "I was in Afghanistan for a while, so I have some training. I brought my - uh - weapons and medical kit, and went into the city."

_"Wait, what? That's dangerous!"_

"Well, obviously, but I'm fine."

_"Jesus, Amber. Well, all right. The university did not suffer from the whole ordeal, so I'm going back on Monday. You?"_

"Yes, of course. I'm actually planning on working on that essay today."

_"What? The Shakespeare one? You don't think the professor will cut us some slack - considering the bloody ALIEN INVASION and all?"_

She laughed. "Probably. But I'm going to finish it just in case."

_"Damn, now I have to do that as well."_

"No you don't. Honestly though - are you all right?"

_"Yes, I promise. If I'm able to even consider working on an essay - I'm fine. Anyway, I just wanted to check up on you - see if you were bloody well ALIVE, and if you are coming back to school."_

"Rather surreal, isn't it? But I'm fine, Allen, thank you for calling. I'll see you Monday, yeah?"

_"Yeah. Bye, Amber."_

"Bye," she said, and poked her elbow on the phone to hang up.

She stopped then, having a moment where everything seemed too dark, too painful, and too frightening.

She sighed as she put her head in her hands for a moment.

"No," she eventually murmured to herself. "Stop wallowing."

And with that, she took a deep breath, and continued on the dishes.

 


	5. What Is a Sonnet?

-o-

He woke up the next morning, and his mind went through a series of emotions until he realised where he was, and what had happened during the past few days.

Well, he had not been collected by anyone during the night, nor had he been killed in his sleep – he had even slept well.

He lay there for a bit, staring at the ceiling, but froze when he heard a sound from outside the room.

He was in the middle of the floor in a flash – instantly alert – but then he heard her curse, so he put his ear to the door.

_"Fucking chair,"_ he heard her hiss. " _Why did I even put that chair there? Ouch, ouch, ouch."_

A long moment later, he heard her hum again.

What was wrong with the infernal human?

-o-

After getting ready – making himself as presentable as he could – he exited the room, and carefully moved to the living room.

She was there – on the floor of all places. Surrounded by books and papers.

"Good morning," she said without looking at him. "Did you sleep well?"

He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned his shoulder on the doorframe, just looking at her. "I did, in fact. Whatever are you doing?"

She looked at him then, smiling sheepishly. "I remembered that since the world is still up and running, I still have an essay to hand in. I am studying literature, you see."

"You do not seem like the literature type."

This was apparently the wrong thing to say, because she looked somewhat offended. "Why?"

He raised an eyebrow. "It might have something to do with 'people usually do that - right up to the point where they may or may not have a metal marble lodged in their brain."

She stared at him for a moment before chuckling. "Ah. That. Have you looked around, though?"

He had, but not properly. His mind had been rather occupied, so it wasn't until now he noticed the books. There were small shelves in between everything else, and each shelf had a row of books. And there were a lot of shelves, in fact. How could he have not noticed?

"Anyway, I remembered I have an essay. I was to pick a genre I wouldn't usually choose, so I picked romance. I am to write a love poem as well – which I have done. A sonnet, more specifically."

"A sonnet?"

She seemed to contemplate this for a moment. "Simplified – a poem of fourteen lines. It's all terribly exciting."

He raised an eyebrow. "That sounds exciting, indeed."

She chuckled. "It's an art, to write a proper sonnet. Want to hear an example?"

He shrugged. "Why not?"

She smiled. "One of the most famous writers – Shakespeare – was rather apt at sonnets. One of the more famous ones goes like this."

He watched her narrow her eyes in concentration. Apparently she remembered it by heart.

_"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?"_ she began, and there was something soft in her voice that made him pause. _"Thou art more lovely and more temperate. Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, and summer's lease hath all too short a date."_

It was like she was far away when she continued, like her mind was somewhere else entirely.

_"Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines, and often is his gold complexion dimmed; and every fair from fair sometime declines, by chance, or nature's changing course, untrimmed. But thy eternal summer shall not fade, nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st. Nor shall death brag thou wand'rest in his shade, when in eternal lines to Time thou grow'st. So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see, so long lives this, and this gives life to thee."_

Shakespeare. He had to remember that name.

"I like – correction, _love_ Shakespeare. If only I could write sonnets like he did. That won't be happening any time soon, I can tell you that much."

He gave her an amused look. "And have you written your 'sonnet' then?"

She rolled her eyes. "Yes. But they gave me a ridiculous topic." She gestured dramatically with her hand as she continued. "What is love to me?" Her expression changed, and she raised an eyebrow. "How very creative."

"Let me hear it, then."

She actually laughed. "Absolutely not. I have no intention of making a fool of myself in front of a Norse god. Sorry. Also, I wrote this in fifteen minutes, so I think I will scrap it and write another."

-o-

He couldn't help himself when she went to take a shower a while later. He sat down among the papers, looking for the sonnet she absolutely did not want him to read.

He had expected – he didn't quite know what he had expected, but he had _not_ expected to be slightly impressed.

_Let me count the ways._

_Of what I want love to be._

_I want love that stirs fire to a blaze._

_I want love that sets me free._

_I want to be swept off my feet._

_I want to be kissed in the rain._

_I want someone sweet._

_And someone a little insane._

_Love can be found in an unexpected place._

_You'll never know unless you look._

_You see, life is a maze._

_Or scattered pictures in a scrapbook._

_What do I want love to be?_

_I just want to be loved...for me._

She had written this in fifteen minutes? He had to admit - the woman wasn't entirely talentless.

He moved away from the papers after reading the sonnet one more time, and went to browse the bookshelves instead.

-o-

When she came into the living room again, he was sitting in the sofa with a book in his hands.

"So," she said when she entered. "What are you going to do?"

He looked up at her. _I have no idea,_ he thought. _But I cannot say that, now can I?_

When he didn't say anything, she sighed. "Look, I have no idea what I am doing here. But I think there is a very long story behind what happened during the past few weeks, and I won't be the one who sends you to your death." She paused, apparently thinking about what to say next. "It's foolish of me, probably, but that doesn't really change anything. So, you can stay, for now, if you want. I'm pretty sure no one will come looking for you here. I haven't lived in New York for long, so practically no one knows where I live. No one knows exactly where I live, when I think about it. In return..."

She trailed off, and he felt himself getting annoyed. She was going to demand things now? That did not sit well with him.

"In return, you don't kill me in my sleep, and you don't try to take over the world again. Deal?"

He looked at her, perplexed. _That_ was her demands?

"You are absurdly ridiculous," he heard himself say, and was surprised when she merely laughed.

"I know. Are you hungry? I can try to not set fire to the kitchen again."

-o-

"Will you forgive me if I spend the day working on this bloody essay?"

He gave her a puzzled look. "Why would I not?"

She shrugged. "Because I am poor company? Although, my professor will be somewhat upset with me if I don't turn this in. So, well, I kind of have to write this thing. I am supposed to write a bloody love story, but the whole thing has escalated rather drastically. The professor didn't give us a limit on how long the thing was supposed to be, and I have now written thirty thousand words."

"Thirty thousand words?"

She got up, and picked a book from the shelf. "This book is forty thousand words, if that gives you any idea."

It was not a very thick book, but a book nevertheless.

He raised an eyebrow. "I see."

She smiled. "Indeed. I don't think school essays are supposed to be that long. But, oh well. If it is good enough, he will probably forgive me."

"And is it? Good enough?"

She shrugged. "I have no idea. I'm not a terrible writer, but I am suddenly writing a book – almost. I don't think I am _that_ good."

"And what is this love story about, then?" he asked, amused.

She rolled her eyes. "I really wish he would have given me a different topic. Oh well." She paused, and smirked. "It is all _very_ cliché. Girl meet boy – boy is a tormented soul, but she makes him see that the world is lovely after all. Amazing, am I right?"

"Sounds _fascinating_."

She chuckled. "Oh, you have no idea."

"I would, if you let me read it."

She laughed out loud this time. "You realise it's the most fluffy, ridiculous thing – ever?"

He shrugged. "I would not know, considering how I have not read it."

She shook her head as she bent down to pick up a stack of papers. "I'll let you read it, but only if you promise me to tell me if it is horrendous. This thing started as – I don't even know – and now it has gotten out of hand. I know how to finish it and all, but I am somewhat blind. I have no idea if it's good or bad any longer. The latter, probably. Thus, I would like to know."

He smirked as he accepted the papers from her. "I promise."

-o-

The woman had no idea how much of a skilled writer she was, that much was certain. He had expected a dull, cliché-filled story, but this was not that. Well, there were clichés, but the clichés were tastefully done, and not too saccharine. And the story was not dull – not at all.

And hilarious. The story was hilarious. He was relieved to have a stack of papers to hide behind, because he had to stifle a laugh rather frequently. He couldn't stop himself from smiling at times, however, and that was when he was happy he was hiding behind the papers.

The woman was talented, and she had no idea.

And he had been reading for an hour, nonstop. Realising made him feel ridiculous.

-o-

He had been sitting there for a whole hour now, reading her story. She had all kinds of regret over allowing him to read. It was terrible, she knew it. She had seen him smirk several times, and she couldn't make herself believe it was because he was so entertained by the humour, but because he came across a severely ridiculous part.

Eventually – _finally_ – he put the papers on the table, and the rather stiff look he gave her made her inwardly cringe. "I should throw it away, shouldn't I?"

"No," he said, surprisingly. "No, you should finish it, and hand this in to your professor."

"Really?" she asked, utterly perplexed.

"Really," he replied, and then vanished from the room.

-o-

And so, she did. She wrote the entire day – only interrupted by dinner – and then through the night. When morning came, she triumphantly wrote the final word.

"Hah!" she exclaimed. "Suck it – um – _words!"_

-o-

He woke up Sunday morning, and found Amber in the living room, and she had obviously not gone to bed yet. She was sitting on the floor, her hair was an utter chaos, her clothes were wrinkled, but she had a beaming smile on her face.

"Hah!" she exclaimed, and pointed at her computer. "Suck it – um – _words!"_

He couldn't stop the chuckle, and the result was a crimson red human female looking at him. "Oh – hello – good morning. Is it morning? Damn."

"Good morning," he said, raising an eyebrow. "Good mood?"

She beamed. "I actually finished the story. It is a _tad_ long, so maybe my professor will throttle me, but so be it. It's almost fifty thousand words. That's pretty close to a standard book." She looked at the computer. "Damn. I can't really hand in a small book."

"Let me read it," he said before thinking.

-o-

The story – although filled with a whole lot of cottony fluff – was actually rather good. Most definitely well-written.

And she looked so utterly nervous that he realised he had to tell her.

"Is it terrible? Should I just throw it away? Please tell me if I should."

He shook his head. "You are more talented than you realise, I believe. You were asked to write a love story, and so you did – and rather skillfully so."

She looked completely confused. "What? Really?"

"Really. Now, stop asking."

She let out a surprised laugh, but nodded. "Thank you."

He just rolled his eyes, resulting in yet another laugh.

-o-

He was sitting on the bed again that night, just thinking. What was he doing? This was…he didn't know what this was. He couldn't stay here. He had to…he didn't know that either. He wanted to take responsibility for his actions – but that would not end well for him.

So what did he do? Hide. He was hiding, like some coward.

Hiding, drinking wine, reading love stories, and eating spaghetti.

The thing was… He didn't know _what_ to do. He didn't want to die. So what could he do? Flee? Flee where?

There was nowhere he could flee. He had nowhere to go.

The god of mischief put his head in his hands, and sighed wearily.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> She wrote that sonnet in 15 minutes because I wrote that sonnet in 15 minutes. I would just like to assure you that there will be no more sonnets in this fic xD All right? xD  
> Oh, and that half-a-book long essay? A friend of mine did this exact thing once. I found it amusing.  
> One final thing; this chapter did not turn out as I intended. At all. I don't particularly like it, and that's why I'm going to post chapter 6 along with it.  
> *Gives virtual hugs*
> 
>  


	6. The Woman was Completely Mad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 6! So, do you like the progress? Did you survive the sonnet? xD  
> I'm really sorry for putting you through that xD  
> Disclaimer – Ain't mine!  
> Now, on with the story!

 

-o-

Sunday night, Amber came into the living room, holding something. "So," she said, shrugging. "Since we have no idea what we are doing-"

"Who said I had no idea what I am doing?"

She froze, apparently surprised by the irritation in his voice. "All right, since _I_ have no idea what I am doing – if you need to, I don't know, reach me while I'm not here or something – you should have this."

He gave her a puzzled look, and was surprised when she sat down in the sofa next to him - so close that he could smell the apple shampoo she used.

"A phone," she said, and leaned even closer.

-o-

The whole thing had been very uncomfortable, in a most comfortable way. She had been sitting so close to him, as if he wasn't something dreadful, as if she didn't mind being close to him.

 _Dangerous,_ he thought. _Do not allow your mind to go in such directions._

He wasn't about to admit as such, but the idea of someone not afraid of him - someone who didn't mind sitting close to him - the idea was...something he yearned for.

But he was not about to admit to anything of the kind.

At least he knew how to send a text message. The idea made him want to laugh bitterly.

-o-

"Oh Jesus Christ!" Amber exclaimed the next morning as she looked at a small…thing. "It's five degrees outside! I'm going to freeze to death." He couldn't help but laugh, and she rolled her eyes. "Yes, yes, not everyone can be a frost giant," she said, and his laughter ended abruptly.

"What?!"

She wasn't paying attention to what she was saying, apparently, but froze when she heard the tone in his voice, and turned to him with apprehension. "You…are a frost giant? No?"

Yes, he felt every bit a frost giant in that moment, because his blood went cold, and he gave her a frosty look.

She looked at him, almost fearful now. "I shouldn't have said that, apparently. I'm really sorry."

"How do you even _know?"_ he hissed. "Do you even _know_ what a frost giant is?"

"I…" She trailed off, but then she sighed. "Northern mythology was somewhat of an obsession of mine for a long time. So I… That's how I know. I did not mean to hurt or insult you, however. I'm sorry."

"You speak of things you know nothing about," he said as he got up from the sofa in one, fluid motion. "And you speak of things you should fear."

"Why?"

Her tone was soft, and it made him even angrier. "Why? Because…because they are _monsters,"_ he hissed, and before he knew what he was doing, he let his glamour fall, revealing his true shape – blue skin, red eyes. A monster.

He had expected her to recoil, to shy away from him in disgust. She didn't. She merely looked at him.

"You are not a monster, Loki," she said quietly, and then she was out the door before he could say anything.

-o-

She had to admit she was rather distracted during her first lesson. The memory of Loki with blue skin and red eyes – and the utter _pain_ she saw in those red eyes – it wasn't just something she could forget.

 _Father of the year award goes to – not Odin,_ she thought, and sighed. _Jesus, what am I going to do?_

She couldn't very well hide him forever. She couldn't – and wouldn't. It wasn't right. But for now – well – she would let him stay.

Also, he was totally hot with blue skin and red eyes. She wondered what he would say if she told him.

-o-

She was rather nervous when she stopped in front of her professor after the first lesson was over.

"I was wondering, professor, if there was a word limit on the essay you assigned?"

He looked up from the papers on his desk. "No, but I would of course prefer if it was, well, at least two thousand words."

She fidgeted. "Yes, well, I was thinking more of a _limit._ A maximum."

"A maximum?" he asked, puzzled. "No. Why do you ask?"

She pulled out the stack of papers from her bag. "Because this is mine."

"Oh, my - how many words?"

"Fifty thousand, or so," she said sheepishly. "It...escalated somewhat."

_"_ _Somewhat?"_

She nodded. "I know there is still a week until we have to deliver, so I am wondering if I have to toss this and write another."

"That depends," the professor said, raising an eyebrow, "on whether you are willing to risk it or not. This might just earn you the highest grade you have gotten so far, or the exact opposite."

She took a deep breath. "I was worried about that. Well, no risk, no reward, isn't that what they say?"

"That is indeed what they say," the professor said, and gave her an amused smile when she gave him the papers.

-o-

She was packing her things, ready to go home, when her professor entered the classroom. She was the only one left, so when she realised he was in fact looking for her, she froze.

He stopped next to her desk, smiled, and placed her fluffy love story down.

She stared at him, and then at the papers.

A+ it read.

"What?" she squeaked. "Really? You – you already graded it?"

He nodded. "Couldn't put it down. Couldn't even find a single grammatical error. If this does not deserve an A+, I do not know what does. Brilliant work."

She squealed, hugged her professor – then realised perhaps one did not hug professors, but he merely laughed, so she ended up beaming. "Thank you!"

He nodded. "You earned it. Not to mention you should consider a carrier in writing. And I truly mean that."

-o-

Loki was in a rather gloomy mood. He had been spending all day alone with his thoughts, and it was not the best of ideas. He already knew he would snap and growl at Amber when she got home, and he knew he wouldn't be able to stop himself from doing it.

The door to the flat opened and slammed shut, and he was almost worried for a moment, but then he heard her voice.

"Loki!" she literally yelled, even though there was absolutely no need to do so. Puzzled – and slightly annoyed – he got up from the sofa, finding her in the hallway.

He didn't quite know what happened, all he knew was that he let out an 'omph' sound when she pounced on him. His arms came up on automatic, but before he could push her away, she stepped back, beaming.

"I got an A+ on my bloody essay!" she declared, and the utter happiness on her face made something in him soften. "A+!" she continued, and he felt the former annoyance turn to amusement when she proceeded to dance an impromptu victory dance right there in the hallway.

"I would never even dare to hand it in, if not for you," she said next, and before he knew it, she had pounced on him again.

She smelled like apple shampoo, cold, and something else – something sweet.

"Thank you, you lovely man!" she declared, kissed his cheek, threw her bag and jacket on the floor, and danced her way into the living room, leaving Loki there, completely gobsmacked.

She had just hugged him twice, called him a lovely man, and then kissed his cheek.

The woman was completely mad.

Loki wasn't annoyed any longer.

-o-

He couldn't help but watch her for the rest of the day, because she kept dancing around with a constantly happy expression on her face.

"How can you be so happy over something so…small?"

He realised it might sound rather offensive, but she just smiled. "I thrive on the little pleasures of life. I am infuriatingly optimistic, according to my sister, and she is correct. But if I am to go around just waiting for something huge to turn my life around – that wouldn't be very productive, now would it? My life is already lovely as it is – even if I have days where I would rather just toss the whole thing out the window."

"And what makes it lovely?"

She shrugged. "An A+ on an essay, a glass of wine, twizzlers, reading a good book, listening to music, having an interesting conversation – you know, the good things in life."

"Twizzlers?"

She laughed as she produced something from a kitchen drawer. "This. It's strawberry flavoured."

He looked with skepticism on the thing she was holding out. A red…something. She laughed, placed it on the kitchen island in front of him, and turned to focus on the food she was making.

He picked it up, and that was when he realised that this was the 'something else' she smelled like. She smelled like green apples and strawberry candy. It was...apt. Somehow.

-o-

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is there such a thing as A+? They seem to get A+ left and right in movies, so I went with A+. xD (I'm Norwegian. Basically, I have no idea what I'm doing. I live in a town with 22k inhabitants. It's all terribly exciting xD)


	7. I'm Really Sorry for What I'm About to Say

-o-

Loki had been there for a week, and she was actually rather happy about having him there. He was clever, brilliant, snarky – everything she adored in a person.

They had actually talked a lot during the past days. Not that the Norse god actually told her much, but she was getting rather good at reading between the lines. He had explained – although vaguely – about how the sceptre worked, what it could do, and how it affected the mind. He always spoke of it as if it was a hypothetical situation, and so she did as well. And with every conversation, Amber found another piece of the puzzle that was Loki, the God of Mischief.

It was quite the puzzle. _Loki_ was quite the puzzle.

Amber liked puzzles.

-o-

She entered her flat after yet another day at the university, humming, like she always did.

The flat was...silent.

"Loki?" No reply. "Loki?"

She entered the living room, and that was when fear took her.

He wasn't there. In fact, the living room was in a chaos. They had taken him. The door was still locked, so it had to be someone from Asgard.

They had taken him.

And that meant... That meant he was probably already dead.

Amber sat down in the sofa, and she was not too surprised when she felt tears trickling down her cheeks.

-o-

She didn't know how long she had been sitting there, but eventually, her tears ran dry - leaving her feeling empty.

She didn't even think when she turned her eyes to the ceiling. "Heimdall, if you are listening – did you even give him a trial? Or did you just execute him right away? If you did – you bastards! Uh, no offense. Well, some offense. Anyway – uh – bad move."

There was no reply, of course.

-o-

She was sitting in the sofa that evening, feeling completely empty. And conflicted. She knew it had to happen at some point – that he would be gone again – she just hadn't expected it to happen so suddenly. She didn't even get to say goodbye.

She almost fell of the sofa when there was a flash of light in the middle of her living room. She let out an undignified squeak, and stared with wide eyes at the phenomenon. The phenomenon turned out to be a woman.

"I apologise for scaring you," the woman said, softly. "But this is…urgent."

A million thoughts went through Amber's mind. This was a visitor from Asgard, that much was certain. And that meant that there was still hope. There was a chance Loki still lived. Who was this woman, though?

"Frigga," she breathed when realisation hit her. "You are Frigga."

The woman gave her a soft smile. "I am. And you are Amber."

"Loki – is he…"

Frigga shook his head. "He lives. I am here to ask you to come with me."

She was about to agree right away, but then froze. "I – why?"

"To help my son," she said, and Frigga actually looked surprised when Amber nodded right away. "You are quick to respond. Are you…infatuated with him?"

Amber frowned. "What? No. But if I can help, I will."

Frigga gazed at her for a long moment. "They will ask you to speak in front of Odin," she said softly. "And there will be little possibility to speak anything but the truth. There is…magic in the air, and it will compel you to speak honestly."

Amber frowned. "First – wow, that is fascinating, and second – I had every intention of telling the truth."

"Good," Frigga said. "I am glad. Are you ready to leave?"

Amber froze. "Now? May I have five minutes?"

Frigga nodded, and Amber ran out of the living room.

She quickly changed her clothes, tried to fix the mess that was her face, and then stopped, looking at herself in the mirror.

She was going to Asgard. Wow. And she was going to speak in front of Odin. Double-wow.

And _wow,_ she was terrified.

_Loki,_ she thought as she tried to calm herself. _It's for Loki._

Loki wasn't dead yet. And if Frigga was here, there was still a chance to save him, because she wouldn't have come otherwise, would she? Amber hoped this was the case.

Amber ran her fingers through her hair, smoothed down her clothes, and exhaled slowly to calm herself.

_This will be fine,_ she thought as she took a deep breath, exhaling slowly again. _You'll be fine._

She re-entered the living room, and took a deep breath as she nodded. "I am ready."

Frigga smiled, and put a hand on Amber's arm before looking at the ceiling. "We are ready, Heimdall."

There was a flash of light, and Amber was utterly unable to breathe for something that felt like an eternity – which in reality was probably no more than a few seconds – and then they 'landed'. If not for the fact that Frigga was still holding her arm in a firm grip, Amber would most definitely have landed in a less gracious fashion.

"Welcome to Asgard," Frigga said softly, and Amber couldn't do anything but stare at their surroundings.

-o-

Loki felt…empty. He couldn't muster up any feeling at all, so all he was left with was…empty.

He wondered why he wasn't dead yet. No one had told him anything, and he was getting restless from waiting. He wished they would just get this over with. It wasn't like he didn't deserve it.

He would get a trial, that much he had picked up on – but he knew that wouldn't change anything. No one would talk in his defense, and he would be sentenced to death. Why would they even bother with a trial?

He thought about Amber. He couldn't help thinking about Amber. She would come home to find her living room in shambles, and him gone. How would she react? Would she be relieved? Probably. She would be sad, he realised as much, but mostly she would be relieved. Because how could she _not?_

Desolate, Loki curled up in a corner of his filthy cell, and sighed.

"Get up!"

He wanted to rage at the guard, but knew it would change nothing, so he obliged, getting up, and following the guard out of the cell.

-o-

He was standing in front of Odin – shackled and defeated – knowing this would not end well, not matter what he said.

"Loki," the Allfather said. "My son."

Loki's heart ached from hearing the words, and he felt like raging. He just didn't have the energy.

"Odin," he simply said, and the one-eyed man actually looked slightly surprised.

"You are here to answer for your crimes, Loki," Odin said, and Loki could hear the weariness in the Allfather's voice. "Do you know what your crimes are?"

This was probably a test, Loki realised. To see whether or not he actually understood what he had done. Well, he had a very clear understanding of that.

"When Thor was banished from Asgard-" he began, but Odin interrupted.

"That is not why you are here today, Loki," the Allfather said, confusing Loki to no end. "Today, you are here to answer for your recent crimes. I believe you know what I speak of."

Loki suppressed the urge to roll his eyes. "If you mean my failed attempt at ruling Midgard, then yes. I know what you speak of."

Odin's eye narrowed in disapproval. "Do not make this worse for yourself, Loki."

'How could I possibly make this worse? It is not as if it will change the outcome, no matter how I choose to speak of it' Loki wanted to say. He wanted to laugh, to scream, and he wanted to spit out poisonous words, to _hurt_ the man he once called father.

Loki did, nor said any of these things. It would bring him no joy, and he was too tired to put up a fight.

"Yes, Allfather," he said instead, and Odin's one eye widened in surprise.

After a long moment, Odin spoke again. "Would you like to say something in your defence?"

Loki contemplated this for a bit. He could try to explain, to tell Odin what had really happened - that he had not been fully in control of his actions, that he was not in his right mind, but he doubted it would change anything. Loki was the Liesmith, the Silvertongue. No one would believe him, no matter what he did. There were ways to counteract the magic in the air, and Odin knew this. Loki knew this. He could not win, no matter what he said or did.

And in the end...he could not make himself plead. He could not make himself tell the truth – the truth of how pathetic he was, because he was too weak to resist. The truth of how _desperate_ he had been, so desperate that he would do the same again, just to escape the madness of the empty void. He would have allowed himself to be made a puppet, because nothing – _nothing_ – was worse than falling for eternity through the empty, black, maddening cosmos.

He could not make himself plead.

One thing he _could_ say, however, even if it pained him to do so. But if he was to be executed, if this was the only chance he had… His eyes strayed for a moment, briefly meeting another pair of eyes. A pair of eyes filled with sorrow. Frigga.

Loki realised then, that even if she would never know the truth, at least she would know this.

"I am sorry," he said, knowing it would make up for nothing, but he needed to say it, even so.

The room was silent for a very long moment before Odin spoke again. "Do you have more to say, Loki?"

There was a tone in his voice, like he hoped Loki would say more, but Loki knew he could not make himself speak again. "No."

Odin sighed. "Very well. You may step aside, so someone else may speak."

_Lovely,_ Loki thought. _They have actually called on someone to speak against me. Why would they even bother?_

"Call her forward."

Loki was pulled to the side, and watched as a familiar shape took his place in front of Odin.

Amber. It couldn't be. But it was. However had that happened? Why would they drag her to Asgard?

There was a truth serum in the air. She wouldn't be able to lie. That would either help him, or doom him.

"You are called here to speak up for my son. You are aware you cannot lie, and that you must answer any question for this to be legitimate. Do you accept?"

"Of course," the woman said, as if anything was 'of course' about this situation.

"Good. You have allowed my son shelter, that is correct?"

"Yes."

"Even though you knew his crimes."

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because I don't approve of the death penalty. And because his eyes are green."

He could see that she looked slightly surprised. She hadn't intended on actually saying that, then.

Odin looked puzzled. "Because his eyes are green? What do you mean by that? Why is that relevant?"

"Because the sceptre made his eyes blue."

This made Odin pause. "Did it?"

Amber nodded. "Yes." When Odin merely looked at her, she sighed. "Honestly, does no one pay attention around here? Am I the only one who has put the pieces of the puzzle together?"

Loki had to stifle a laugh, hearing the jaded tone in her voice.

"Oh, this truth thing really works, doesn't it? Sorry."

Odin, however, did not look angry. "Apology accepted. Now, tell me - what pieces of the puzzle are you talking about?"

"This is what I have gathered so far," she said before glancing at Loki. "Sorry, Loki, but apparently I can't help myself."

Loki couldn't help but give her a slightly amused look, and she sighed in relief.

"Something terrible happened before Loki went ahead and tried to take over the world - I don't know what, but it left him in scattered pieces. He hasn't told me this, but it is pretty obvious, if you look at him. He was pretty much broken." She winced. "Sorry, Loki. Anyway, he was a mess, and then someone went ahead and gave him that bloody sceptre - and that was his only way out of the terrible event that came before this."

Loki had to really look at the woman. He hadn't told her any of this - but she had somehow managed to figure it out.

"Did no one actually _look_ at him when he roamed around with that bloody sceptre? His eyes were bright blue, except for the times where he fought it off - fought off the puppeteer in the other end. His eyes turned green then. I'm not saying he is innocent, but I think everyone should get a trial – a proper trial with all the facts available – and I do not think Loki deserves execution."

"Are you in love with Loki?"

Amber looked annoyed. "No."

Loki felt a twinge of pain at her short dismissal.

Odin studied the annoyed woman for a moment. "Could you be? In the future?"

"Yes," she replied instantly, and then closed her eyes for a moment. "Jesus. A+ truth serum."

Loki felt something flutter in his chest. Then he realised he would probably be dead within a day, and something in him just withered.

Odin, however, looked surprised. "You have seen what he has wrought, and yet you have such faith in him? Why?"

Amber slapped a hand over her mouth, and managed a strangled ' I'm really sorry for what I am about to say.'

She let her hand fall, and took a deep breath. "Because no one _see_ him. Except for Frigga, perhaps. _You_ do not see him – oh, god, sorry – and you have not exactly made the best decisions when it comes to Loki. I do not doubt for a second that you do see him as your son, and that you love him as such, but the way he has been treated his _entire_ life… Are you truly surprised? You have wrought this just as much as he has."

"He has told you these things?"

She shook her head. "No. But I read. I listen. I observe."

"And this makes you think you understand everything?"

She shook her head again. "Not at all. But I do see a part of a much bigger picture."

"What do you mean 'you read?'"

"Northern mythology."

"Half-truths and fiction."

"Not all of it. I watched Loki read a book – a book about himself, in fact, and he looked utterly shocked all the way through. Not to mention he is taught that he is a monster."

-o-

Amber spoke for a long time, and Loki was taken aback when he heard how much she had gathered, how many pieces of the puzzle she had managed to piece together. She had it right – all of it – and he could see Odin realise the same.

"And what would you do, if you were in my stead?" Odin finally asked.

"I would give him a chance to repent," Amber replied without hesitation. "On earth."

"And how would you suggest he would do so?"

She paused for a moment. "I would make it his choice. Not without any say, of course. It would have to be something…meaningful. But the core of it – I would make it his choice."

Odin gazed at the tiny woman for a small eternity. "Would you still allow him shelter? Would you aid him? Guide him?"

"Yes," Amber replied without hesitation, and Loki just stared at her.

Odin gazed at her for yet another small eternity before nodding. "So be it," he said, and Loki sucked in a breath, resulting in Odin turning to him. "Unless you object? Would you rather have a different outcome? An outcome I cannot guarantee would be better?"

"No," Loki said, and inwardly cursed the truth serum. "I do not object."

"So be it," Odin said, and Loki couldn't believe it.

-o-

Amber couldn't believe it. She had just been utterly rude – severely so – and yet, Odin had not been angry. He had looked…sad.

Because she had been right, she realised.

And the result? Loki was coming back with her. She couldn't believe how relieved she was over this, but she was apprehensive as well. This was a rather big commitment. Not that she was going back on it.

A little apprehension was allowed, though, wasn't it?

-o-

She was standing outside that intimidating throne room when Frigga came over.

"Thank you," the woman said, and pulled Amber into her arms. "I do believe you just saved my son. And I thank you for it."

Amber couldn't help but smile at the woman. "Thank you for coming to get me."

Frigga stepped back, and gazed at Amber for a moment. "Shall you find yourself in need - call on me. Call to Heimdall, and I will come."

There was a hint of steel in the woman's eyes, and Amber just stared at her for a moment before nodding. "Thank you."

"No," Frigga said, shaking her head. "Thank _you."_

-o-

She was brought back to the rainbow bridge, and looked nervously at Heimdall. "I'm sorry for yelling at you. I was...upset."

"You are forgiven," the statue of a man said, and Amber let out a relieved breath.

She turned around, and saw a familiar shape walk toward her. Loki. She wanted to beam at him, hug him, and perhaps clap a bit, but she had no idea whether or not he was furious at her. Damn that truth serum. She'd had no choice but to answer the questions. Every single one of them. Lovely.

"Hello," she said as he reached her. "And...I'm sorry."

His eyes were wide, and there was a sense of wildness to him that Amber couldn't quite decipher. Relief? Anger? Shock? She didn't know.

"I can't believe you," he said, and she couldn't decipher the tone in his voice either.

Giving him a mournful look, she sighed. "Well, it wasn't like I had any choice in the matter."

He shook his head. "Not _that_. Why would you – how did this happen? What are you doing here?"

"Well, I may or may not have called Heimdall and everyone else a bastard, and then Frigga arrived. I almost fell off the sofa."

She was relieved to see a glint of amusement in his eyes. "I can imagine." He paused for a moment. "I am quite certain you are not aware of what you are getting yourself into."

She chuckled. "You think so? Really? Believe me, I have no idea. But I'm pretty decent at winging it. I'll manage."

"I hope so," Loki said quietly, and Amber had never been more certain that she would become an expert in 'winging it'.

-o-

Suddenly, he was back in her flat, as if nothing had happened. "I - I need a moment," he said, and she just nodded when he went into his room.

He sat down on the bed, and that was when he started to shiver.

He didn't want to die - but he had been very close today. If not for a human. He knew he would not convince Odin - no matter what. Amber, though? She had managed.

_A+ parenting. Honestly._ Amber had said, and winced at her own words. She had done so rather frequently.

It was a miracle Odin hadn't just locked her up as well.

_Because she spoke the truth,_ he thought. _Because - even if no one has told her, she knew. She had figured it out._

He just sat there for a while, contemplating...everything.

_What unexpected turns life takes,_ he thought, and shook his head.

"Loki!" he heard Amber yell from somewhere in the flat. "I didn't burn down the kitchen again! Do you want lasagna?"

_What unexpected turns, indeed._

Shaking his head in amusement, Loki went to figure out whatever lasagna was.

 


	8. As of Today, Apparently

-o-

Loki woke up the next morning, and it took him a moment before he remembered the unexpected events of yesterday.

He didn't have to be afraid any longer. Well, there were still the Avengers, but they could be avoided. Hopefully. Asgard had been his biggest concern, and…he didn't have to worry about Asgard any longer.

Everything was uncertain now, however. His future, what he was supposed to do – he had no idea, quite frankly.

Then he heard Amber pass by his bedroom, humming.

And for some reason, it was the most calming sound he had heard in his entire life.

-o-

He got up, and found her in the kitchen, making pancakes.

"Good morning," she said, smiling at him. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yes," he simply replied, and she paused for a moment, but then she smiled again.

-o-

"So," Amber said a while later. "What are you going to do?"

That was the question, was it not? She had made quite the case, now he only had to live up to it.

How did one repent for trying to take over the world?

"How does one repent for trying to take over the world?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

She actually burst out laughing. "When you put it like that... I have no idea."

When did this happen? When did they _joke_ about his failed attempt at world domination?

_As of today, apparently,_ he thought, and gave her an amused look. "Nor do I. Yet."

"That sounds about right," she said, still smiling. She looked thoughtful for a moment. "How can you do - well - anything? You can't really go outside."

He gave her a small smile. "I can, actually. I was...given a new spell before leaving Asgard. I am a shapeshifter - as you well know - but I cannot keep up a different appearance for long periods of time. Not as complex as needed, that is. Now, however, I can. Thus, I can go outside."

"Really?" she said, and the genuine excitement in her voice surprised him. "That's brilliant!"

He would probably never understand this woman. Her excitement at the most random times puzzled him. And now? She was practically more pleased than him with the fact that he could go outside.

She was puzzling, indeed.

-o-

"So, do you want to go outside? It's a lovely day."

He gazed at her, realising he was...nervous? Yes. He was, in fact, nervous. Apprehensive, at least. But he did want to go outside. Eventually, he nodded, and she gave him a happy smile.

-o-

"You have to wear a coat," she said a while later. "You will look odd if you stroll around without a coat. Frost giant or no, wear a coat."

He was immediately angry at the mention of frost giants. Did she not see? Did she not realise what she spoke of? How could she speak of it in such a carefree way? It was hard to believe she was not mocking him.

But then he saw her freeze up. She was not mocking him. She merely...did not look at it as something monstrous - something evil.

And - he realised - it was liberating.

Something came over him, and he let go of the anger. He raised an eyebrow, let his eyes flash red, and then proceeded with putting on the coat she was holding out to him.

She stared at him at first - wide-eyed. But then something shifted in her expression, and she ended up looking rather amused.

When he smirked at her, she burst out laughing. What was the world coming to?

"All right," she said, shaking her head in amusement. "The epic adventure that is the outside world awaits."

-o-

"I'm going to tell people you are my roommate."

He was torn from his thoughts, and looked at the small woman walking next to him. "Roommate? That sounds...ridiculous."

She chuckled. "Well, what do you suggest? I have the God of Mischief living with me, yes _that_ God of Mischief. Don't worry, he has _promised_ to not take over the world again." He gave her a blank look, and she shrugged. "Unless you have another suggestion, I'm going to go with roommate."

He rolled his eyes. "Very well."

She gazed at him for a moment. "You still look the same to me, by the way. Why is that?"

"Would you prefer if you saw me differently?"

She shook her head. "Absolutely not. How, though?"

"Because I allow you to see me."

She chuckled. "How gracious of you. Thank you." She paused. "I mean it, though. It would be utterly unsettling to look at you and see - well - not you. I like you, just the way you are, in every way."

She proceeded to turn her gaze to a nearby tree, saying something about the lovely colours - as if what she had just said was nothing out of the ordinary.

He didn't exactly hear her what she was saying, exactly, because he had more than enough, processing what she had just said.

Never had anyone told him anything of the kind. No one liked him just the way he was. He was never good enough - never.

He realised she was looking at him with a puzzled frown. "What?"

He just shook his head before looking at the tree she had been so enthusiastic about.

-o-

"Can you show me how you look to other people? I feel as if that is something I should know, for some reason."

He smiled before shifting the magic to allow her to see the glamour.

"Hm," she said, studying him. "You look completely different - but yet... I see that it is you. Because I know it is you. Thank god you kept the black hair. I like your black hair."

He had to stop himself from sucking in a breath when her hand came up to touch his hair. He had to stop himself from closing his eyes as well, when her fingers moved to his cheek, and then his jaw.

"This is utterly bizarre," she said as she withdrew her hand. "I definitely prefer you the way you are."

He shifted back, and was taken aback when she sighed - so genuinely, it seemed - in relief.

-o-

Amber found it was lovely to see Loki outside. He seemed...happy. He wasn't exactly the 'happy' type, he was more of the 'dark and tormented soul' type, and seeing him like this... It was just lovely.

It felt like they had made some kind of breakthrough today, as if Loki had let go of something.

He had been angry at first, when she carelessly mentioned his frost giant heritage. But then, something had happened, and his eyes had flashed red, as if he was teasing her.

Definitely a breakthrough. They had actually joked about the fact that he attempted to take over the world as well. Joked. It was rather ridiculous.

He had looked at her in odd ways today – she wondered why.

-o-

"What. No."

She gave him an amused look. "It's a corn dog."

He looked at the meat on a stick she was holding out. "That is not corn. Nor is it a dog."

She laughed. "Well, it's a sausage on a stick, basically. And we call sausages in bread - hot dogs."

He looked at her as if she was completely out of her mind. "Why, by the Nine Realms would you call them such a thing?"

She laughed again. "It began as a joke - at some point in time - because there is a breed of dogs that somewhat looks like a sausage. Thus, hot dogs."

"That's...ridiculous."

She grinned. "Yes. Now, corn dog?"

"Absolutely not."

"Spoil sport."

-o-

This was nice, walking with Loki. It was getting late, and usually she would have been home long ago. New York was not the safest of places, after all.

Now, however, she was walking down the street with the God of Mischief. And said God of Mischief would be perfectly capable of taking on - well - anyone, anywhere, no matter what. No matter how _many,_ even.

She felt rather safe.

"You seem lost in thought."

She looked at him. "I would usually be home ages ago."

He looked slightly puzzled. "Would you like to return home?"

She shook her head. "That's not the reason. The reason is simply because New York is dangerous. Too dangerous for me to stroll around after dark. But with you here... Well, I thought perhaps you would fare better than me if some poor sod attempted to mug us."

He looked amused. "I believe I would be able to handle the situation, yes."

"How much does it take to actually harm you? If someone shoots at you, what will happen?"

"It would be...uncomfortable. But by no means lethal."

"Wow."

He smirked. "Thank you."

She couldn't help but laugh.

-o-

Loki went to take a shower when they returned home, and when he came out of the bathroom again, he heard Amber's phone ring.

"Hello?" he heard her voice from the kitchen. "Hi! Give me a second to put you on speaker." There was a pause. "There! Hi!"

_"_ _Hi, Amber,"_ a female voice said. _"_ _How are you?"_

"Merlin, it's good to hear your voice, May. I'm fine. I'm…great, actually. Life is good. University is great, New York is great, and I got a roommate. How are you?"

_"_ _I'm good as well. I'm more interested in hearing about your life, though. Roommate? Tell me everything!"_

"Oh, he's great. His name is Loki – lah."

_"_ _Lokelah?"_

"Yes. But everyone just calls him Loki. Easier."

_"_ _I see. And how is he? Wait – describe him with ten words."_

"Hmmm, all right. Intelligent. Well-read. Sassy. Sarcastic. Strong. Hilarious. Passionate - and no, not in that way. Or, I assume he is, but I wouldn't know. Charismatic. Fierce. ...Gorgeous."

Loki didn't know what to do, he just stood there, frozen on spot. Was that truly what she thought about him? No. No, it couldn't be. She was merely saying this because it would be best - considering how he would be around for a while.

_"What, really?"_ He heard the voice reply. _"Where did you manage to find the perfect man?"_

He heard Amber chuckle. "I ran into him in a park. Literally ran into him."

Well, that much was true. She had kneeled down in front of him. The memory made him wince.

_"How did you go from there to roommates?"_

He heard Amber chuckle again. "Well, I ran into him _again._ Literally. Then I met him at a museum. And then – he showed up at my door."

_"_ _What? Why?"_

"Because he had read my 'roommate wanted' post online. He didn't know it was me, though."

_"_ _That sounds…suspicious."_

"I know. But trust me – and I mean that – trust me, it wasn't. It was all completely random."

_"_ _All right. You are probably the least naïve person I know. I trust you. So, where is he now?"_

"In the shower."

_"_ _Oh, is he, hmmm?"_

"May, shut your face."

_"_ _Aw. I only wish to see this 'gorgeous, fierce man' you live with."_

"What, you want me to go casually videotape him in the shower?"

_"_ _Yes, would you? That would be lovely."_

"Not in a million years."

_"_ _I know. How's school?"_

Loki retreated to the bathroom, still shaken over the shining description of himself he had just heard.

 


	9. It Will Be All Right

-o-

A few days later, Loki came out of the bathroom – again hearing Amber talking on the phone.

Except this time, she sounded distraught.

"Yes, sweetheart, I miss you too," she said, and the pain was audible in her voice. "I love you too. You know I do." There was a pause. "Don't cry, dearest mine." There was a longer pause, and then Amber continued in an almost broken voice. "I know I promised to always be there. I'm sorry I'm not there now. I'm sorry I'm so far away."

Loki's heart gave a painful twinge from the sound of her voice.

"Please, sis," he heard her say in a shivering voice. "You are breaking my heart. Please..."

He had never heard Amber like that. She wasn't exactly the first to break under pressure.

But this was her sister. And he understood.

He listened to her silent, sad voice until she hung up, and then there was a long moment of silence before he heard a sound. A quiet sob.

Loki acted before he really considered what he was doing. He walked into the living room, over to where she was sitting in the sofa, took her hand, pulled her to him, and wrapped his arms around her, nuzzling her hair.

There was a moment of absolute silence, but then she relaxed in his arms, buried her face in his shirt, and cried in such a broken-hearted way that he wrapped his arms even closer around her.

"I know," he murmured. "I know. It's all right. It will be all right."

-o-

He didn't know how long they had been standing there, but eventually her crying stilled.

"I'm sorry," she hiccupped. "I didn't mean to… It's just - my sister is having a rough time, and I promised that I would be there for her. But I'm so far away, and it hurts to hear her voice like that. I didn't mean to cry all over you, though. I'm sorry."

He tightened his arms around her. "You have nothing to be sorry for."

She drew a shivering breath. "Thank you. I…thank you, Loki."

"You do not need to thank me, Amber."

-o-

She had ordered pizza, and then asked if he wanted to watch a movie with her. He had of course said yes, and it was like she was relieved over it.

_Foolish woman,_ he thought. _Of course I will watch a movie with you. Whatever that entails._

He would probably do anything for her today, because the lingering sorrow in her eyes made him uneasy. Amber was not made for such lingering sorrow.

-o-

She looked...frail, somehow, where she sat in the sofa, looking at the TV. She was apparently 'browsing Netflix'.

"Something funny," she said. "Yes, I think that would be a good idea."

'Shaun of the Dead' was her choice in the end, and she explained the concept of a zombie apocalypse – ridiculous, which he told her, and she laughed, agreed, and proceeded to tell him how much the concept of zombies terrified her.

The woman who faced death with unwavering courage was afraid of zombies.

He found it stupidly endearing.

-o-

Watching movies was definitely something he wanted to do again. It was highly entertaining. The only problem was – Amber. She didn't laugh. She smiled, yes, but she should have been laughing. He knew her well enough to know by now.

He didn't know what to do to 'fix' her. He generally had little idea of how to comfort someone. But he had to do something, because she was utterly distracting. She smiled again where she should have been laughing, and it prompted him to act – without thinking.

"Amber," he said, and opened his arms to her in a silent offer of – he didn't quite know. Comfort? Closeness?

And he immediately regretted his actions. No matter how relaxed she seemed around him, how comfortable she seemed, no matter how many words of praise she rained on him – it did not mean it was true. Such things were rarely true. And this was _him._ Of course it was not true. She had accepted his comfort earlier today, yes, but that was different. She had been distraught, and he had not exactly given her a choice in the matter, he had merely pulled her to him, without asking whether it was welcome or not.

This, however, this was different. He was giving her the choice. And no one willingly _chose_ being close to him. No one sought him out for comfort. Thus, he regretted his actions. But it was too late to change it, because she was looking at him.

Preparing for yet another bitter rejection, he gazed at her, watching her expression go through the motions – slight confusion, realisation, surprise. He closed his eyes for a moment, and that was why he missed it when her eyes filled with warmth. He opened his eyes again, and was utterly baffled, because suddenly there was a woman in his arms. Said woman seemed to be struggling with her blanket, so he just took it from her, draped it around her, and pulled her closer. She was sitting with her knees pulled up to her chest, and she was…ridiculously small. It was hard to believe that this was the woman who stared death in the eye, and didn't flinch.

He didn't quite know how to act - he didn't even know if this was something she _truly_ wanted, but when she let out a soft sigh, and then relaxed in his arms, he realised his closeness was welcome.

-o-

Apparently, he could 'fix' Amber merely by putting his arms around her, because a little while later, she was laughing. There were still traces of that lingering sorrow, but it was slowly but steadily letting go.

She grabbed something from the table, and leaned back into his arms. "Loki?"

"Hmm?"

She turned her head to look at him, holding up the thing she had grabbed from the table. "It's overdue for you to try these."

He rolled his eyes when he saw what she was holding. "Honestly, woman. Will you ever give up?"

"No," she said, and plucked a straw-shaped, red thing from the packet. The infamous twizzlers. "Please," she continued, holding out the thing for him.

He could actually lean forward and take a bite, he realised, so he rolled his eyes again, and relented. Her eyes widened briefly when he took a bite, but then she gave him an amused smile.

"On a scale from 'wow, gross' to 'utterly delicious' what is it?"

He chewed the thing for a bit. The consistency was unfamiliar, but the taste was not unpleasant.

"It is...surprisingly less foul than I expected."

She laughed a genuine laugh then. "I will choose to translate that to 'mmmh, I need this in my life'."

He gave her an amused smile. He couldn't help it. "That is because you have selective hearing."

"I have very...optimistic ears."

He chuckled. "Matter of debate."

"Whatever," she quipped, and then turned to look at the movie again.

-o-

The movie ended, and he found himself rather saddened by it. He was terribly comfortable, after all, because the warm, soft woman in his arms was very comfortable, indeed.

"Do you want to watch another?"

He definitely wanted to watch another - especially if that meant she would continue sitting exactly where she was right now.

She got up from the sofa, and he realised she would probably go back to her usual spot in the sofa when she returned.

"We need more popcorn. And soda," she declared, and swept into the kitchen.

Loki just stayed where he was, listening to her rummaging around the kitchen, and her humming. That was when he realised she hadn't been humming at all today. And he realised that had unsettled him, even if he did not realise at the time.

She swept back into the living room, and he tried to not hope that she would come back to sit in his arms.

The frail hope died when she sat down in her usual spot, but then she proceeded to grab a pillow before scooting over to him. Her eyes widened for a moment when she realised perhaps he wanted her to sit in her usual spot, but he ignored it, and pulled her to him, resulting in a small sigh of relief.

"All right. You choose this time."

"What?"

She gestured at the screen. "You just read the descriptions, and decide what sounds interesting, and we will watch that. Anything."

She handed him the remote, and he briefly felt like a complete imbecile, but then he figured it out, and began 'browsing Netflix'.

 


	10. Bah, Humbug

-o-

A few days later – three weeks and three days after the day she had manhandled the God of Mischief inside her flat – Amber realised she was, in fact, _happier_ now. She was happier than before Loki had showed up and turned her world upside-down. It was ridiculous, really, but no less true.

Today was the first of December, and it was something she had dreaded for a long time. She wasn't going home for Christmas, so she had expected to celebrate Christmas alone. Now, she would be celebrating Christmas with the God of Mischief. Absurd.

Today was a special day in more than one way, because today was the first day Loki wasn't here. He was doing volunteer work, something he had been reluctant to at first (to say the least), but eventually shrugged at – realising he should just begin somewhere, and see where it took him.

And so, he was aiding the rebuilding of New York. She wondered how he was faring.

-o-

The flat was empty when she returned home from the university, and she had to shake off a brief flash of fear. They hadn't taken him again, had they? No. He would return home soon.

She decided to distract herself with decorating for Christmas. It was December, after all.

Loki would probably hate it, and she couldn't help being amused from the idea of a grumpy God of Mischief.

"Bah, humbug," she said, and went in search for the Christmas decorations.

-o-

She was relieved when she heard the front door open and close a while later. However, she was in the middle of decorating the lamp over the kitchen island, so she couldn't greet him.

"Welcome home," she said loud enough for him to hear. "I'm in the kitchen."

-o-

_Welcome home,_ she said as if that was a perfectly normal thing to say. Did she truly see it that way? Did she see this flat as _his_ home as well? The thought had Loki so distracted that he didn't even reply.

"Loki?"

He shrugged off his coat and headed for the kitchen. He was about to greet her, but paused when he found her standing on top of the kitchen island.

"What in the world are you doing?"

She smiled sheepishly. "Decorating for Christmas. I am very willing to meet you half way on a whole lot of things, but Christmas is not one of them. There will be shiny baubles, ridiculous, glittery things, and generally a whole lot of over-the-top Christmas things.

"Christmas," he said, and then realised, "Yule."

She nodded. "Indeed. This version involves a whole lot of bullshit, however. The birth of Jesus is apparently what we are celebrating. Of course, Jesus was born in March, but that does not seem to matter much. Then we have St. Nicholas – a very generous man once upon a time, and they have somehow twisted into Santa Claus. It's all somewhat ridiculous, but I love it. Not so much Jesus and Santa, but the concept. Christmas time is – for me – peaceful, full of warmth, and about finding ways of making people happy. Thus, Christmas is not negotiable. There will be shiny baubles whether you like it or not. Also, I have been dreading Christmas this year, because I would be spending it alone. Except, now I'm not. I have you. And you have no idea how happy I am about that."

_I have you. And you have no idea how happy I am about that._ Well, he could put up with shiny baubles, if that was her state of mind.

"How was your day? Was it horrendous?"

It had been a horrendous day, indeed. But not in the way he had expected. The horrendous part was watching all the destruction he had caused. He hadn't minded – not really, even if it had been a strange experience – helping out. But it had been…painful to see the aftermath of…well, him.

He realised she was waiting for him to answer. Also, she was about to climb down from the kitchen island. He didn't really think when he reached out his arms for her, and it didn't seem like she thought either – she just allowed him to lift her down to the floor.

She gazed at him with searching eyes. "It was horrendous in a different way than you expected?"

What was it with this woman and her ability to read him without him uttering a word? He couldn't lie, though, so he merely nodded.

"I'm sorry," she said softly, and then her arms came up around his neck, and she hugged him.

It took him a moment to realise what was happening – would he ever get used to someone touching him like this on their own accord? – but then he sighed, and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I'm going back tomorrow," he said, and she just hummed in agreement.

-o-

She hugged him the following day as well. He probably looked like he needed it. He _did_ need it.

He looked at her when she let go of him, and realised she had white dust in her hair, on her cheek, and on her nose.

He didn't even think before reaching out a hand, brushing away the white from her cheek. "What are you doing?"

She smiled sheepishly, apparently unfazed by his touch - surprising him again.

"I'm baking," she said, and gestured down. An apron. She was wearing an apron.

"I see," he replied, raising an eyebrow. "And how is that working out for you?"

"Well, the flour have been acting up a bit, but other than that, fine."

"The flour have been acting up," he deadpanned, and she laughed.

"It has been a menace, quite frankly," she said, and then walked back to the kitchen.

He followed her, but stopped in the doorway, taking in the sight of the kitchen. The flour had been 'acting up' indeed. To the point where it was all over the counters.

"See?" she said, gesturing around. "Complete menace."

He couldn't help himself. He burst out laughing. He laughed even more when she huffed in displeasure, and turned back to her flour-filled project.

"Yes, I am glad you find me hilarious," she said, and he didn't think. He never stopped to think when it came to this woman. He walked over to her until he stood behind her, wrapped his arms around her waist, kissed the top of her head, and let go again.

And of course regretted his actions immediately, just to be surprised again when she laughed. "All right. You are forgiven."

He hadn't meant it as an apology, but apparently she approved – something he didn't quite understand, but decided to be grateful for.

There were these ridiculous waves of… _affection,_ and those made him act without thinking.

Such acts in his past would always end bitterly for him, so when she welcomed his affectionate gestures, he didn't learn. He ended up repeating it.

And it made him happy. _She_ made him happy.

Happiness didn't last, however. He knew this from experience.

For now, though? For now, he was happy. And he decided to enjoy it while it lasted.

-o-

Two days later, he came home - was it home now? She kept saying welcome home, but he had not realised he called it home as well. In his head, at least. Nevertheless, he came home, and was not greeted with a hug as usual.

"Sorry!" he heard her voice from the living room. "I'm...occupied."

He removed his coat and shoes and walked into the living room, finding her by the window, balancing dangerously in the windowsill.

"What are you _doing?"_ he almost hissed as he hurried over to her so he could catch her if she fell.

"Christmassy things," she replied, and promptly toppled over.

He caught her - bridal style - and gave her a stern look. "Does that include breaking your neck?"

She gave him an amused look. "Not as long as you are here to catch me when I fall."

There was something about the way she said it that made him pause for a moment. "Foolish woman," he said as he lowered her to the floor.

"I cannot exactly disagree with you on that," she said before gazing at the window again. "I am almost finished. Will you catch me if I fall again?"

_Always,_ his mind said, and that was the moment where he realised his feelings for this frail mortal was perhaps moving into dangerous territory. The territory outside purely platonic.

"Yes," he said, softly. "Yes, I will catch you if you fall."

 


	11. I Could Honestly Use Some Advice

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 11! Yay! Finally!
> 
> You have no idea how long I spent trying to figure out what Loki should do to 'repent'. I wanted to avoid the whole 'volunteer work' thing, but as you might see, I failed. All my ideas escalated into something that would probably make a whole story on their own, so eventually I just thought 'F it, volunteer work it is'. Maybe things will be different for my next fic :p
> 
> On a different note - I have absolutely nothing against Christianity, or religion in general. People should believe in what they feel is right for them! I'm not religious, but I'm not an atheist either. I just find the whole mix of Jesus and Santa and religion and shopping somewhat odd. I'm Norwegian, so maybe that has something to do with it. Our celebration is a bit different.
> 
> Anyway, thank you for your lovely feedback! It makes me so happy, and I could use a little happy these days. Real life gets too real sometimes, if I am to be honest. Point is; thank you. Your feedback means the world to me!
> 
> Also, the story will get fluffier from now on xD 
> 
> Sorry about the long author's note! But it was needed this time :) 
> 
> Disclaimer: totally not mine!

 

-o-

 

Loki had thought he would loath it – the shiny baubles and horrid decorations. But, he did not. It was hard to loath it, because every single day, he returned home and was greeted with happy smiles, hugs, laughter, and shiny baubles.

Eventually, the shiny baubles became a reminder that someone cared about him. Truly cared about him.

Amber cared about him.

He found he rather liked the shiny baubles.

He had realised at some point that Christmas involved Christmas _presents._ He was supposed to buy something for Amber. Money was not a problem – he had been graciously gifted a credit card after his departure from Asgard. His mother had somehow made that happen, and he had not refused to take the offered money. He couldn’t, because that would result in Amber paying for everything – for _him,_ and that would not do. So, the problem was not the money. The problem was _what_ he was going to buy.

He had _absolutely no idea whatsoever._

-o-

Amber returned home around noon, bummed by the fact that Loki would not return home for several hours.

It was odd, really, the way they did not seem to grow tired of each other. Well, she did not grow tired of him, at least. But it did not seem like he was growing tired of her – or so she hoped.

She was trying really hard to _not_ fall in love with him, but he was making it _extremely_ difficult for her, because he was suddenly all soft and warm – affectionate, quite frankly, and it was having an effect on her, no doubt.

The problem was - she didn't know what consequences if would have - if she fell utterly in love with him. What if everything fell apart? That would not end well, not at all.

And she could not even talk to someone about it.

She looked at the ceiling. "I could honestly use some advice."

-o-

She was in the kitchen - trying to bake again - when there was a sudden flash of light, resulting in a cloud of flour because - well - that happens when you are holding a cup of flour and something startles you.

"Frigga," she breathed when she saw the woman standing in her kitchen. "Hello."

Frigga looked at her, and promptly embraced her, flour and all. "Hello, dear girl," she said, smiling warmly. "I am again sorry for scaring you."

Amber shook her head. "No need to apologise. I generally startle easily."

Frigga gazed at her for a moment. "And yet, you look death in the eye without flinching. And you stand in front of Odin himself - speaking your mind. Most would be fearful, but not you. You were merely apologetic about the words you spoke, but not afraid."

Amber blinked at the woman, taken aback by the sudden turn of events. "That is...different."

Frigga smiled. "A rare soul, you are."

Amber didn't know how to react, so she just smiled. "Loki will not be home for some hours. Would you like a cup of tea?"

"That would be lovely, thank you."

-o-

"You say 'Loki will not be _home'._ Do you see it as his home as well?"

“Of course,” Amber said, puzzled. “It _is_ his home…is it not? He does live here, after all.”

“He does,” Frigga replied, giving Amber a small smile. “But not everyone would be as gracious as you.” She paused for a moment. “And Loki? Does he see this as his home?”

Amber thought about this for a moment. “I assume too much, I think. Because I was about to answer ‘of course’ again, but I have not really thought about it. I have assumed.” She paused, picking up her phone. “I believe he does,” she said after a moment. “Because he sent me a message yesterday. _I will be home an hour later than expected. Do try to avoid any hazardous activities in the meantime.”_

“That makes me happier than you can imagine,” Frigga said before giving Amber an amused look. “Do you often partake in hazardous activities?”

Amber blushed. “Loki may or may not have come home _just_ in time to catch me when I fell from the windowsill the other day. I am…decorating for Christmas.”

Frigga smiled, gazing at Amber. “Is he…happy?”

Amber had to think about this for a moment. “As happy as he can be in the current situation, I think. He is out there, every day, helping restore and rebuild. And he comes home…slightly broken every day.”

This resulted in a sad expression on the woman’s face. “And how broken will he be in the end?”

“What? No,” Amber said, puzzled. “I piece him together – as well as I am able – every day, so he can face another day out there.”

“Do you, truly?” Frigga breathed. “And…he allows you?”

Amber shrugged. “Yes. That is – I don’t coddle him, because I am not that kind of person, and I don’t exactly deliberately piece him together, I just…do the things I do, and I think he gets sort of caught up in the ripple effects of it.”

“I wish I could see him. See him happy. But I do not believe he would show me that part of him.”

Amber thought about this for a moment. “Wait a moment,” she said, and walked out of the kitchen. She returned with something she had forgotten about. “Here,” she said softly, and placed the pictures on the kitchen table in front of Frigga.

Frigga just stared at them – the picture on top, more specifically – not even picking them up.

The top picture was of Loki sitting at the kitchen table, sporting a rather jaded look. On the plate in front of him – eggs and bacon, shaped as a smile.

The thing was, his look was jaded, not annoyed. There was a rather huge difference there.

Frigga finally picked up the pictures, putting the top picture on the table.

The second picture was of Loki as well, in the sofa this time, with a book in his lap. His eyes were on the camera, and he looked…peaceful.

The third picture was of Loki and Amber – a selfie, in fact – and they both looked rather amused. They had been outside one day, and suddenly it had begun snowing, and the wind had picked up, leaving them with red cheeks, hair in all directions, and bright eyes.

Amber had realised they looked rather ridiculous, and had flipped out her phone, pulling Loki close, and declared that they needed to ‘document this moment’, something he had just rolled his eyes at, but looked amused nevertheless.

The fourth picture was of them as well - she had braided glittery garlands into their hair, something Loki had 'tolerated', and then proceeded to 'tolerate' her taking a picture. 

"He was in a particularly good mood that day," Amber said, smiling at the picture.

Frigga didn't utter a word. She just stared at the pictures as if they were miraculous.

The fifth picture was of her. Loki had taken it, and she had not exactly given her consent. She had been baking - with food colouring - and her face was basically a rainbow. She was pointing at the camera - obviously in the process of telling him 'don't you dare'. He dared, of course. The picture had been too hilarious to delete, however, and she had decided to print it.

Frigga put down the picture of her, and instantly dropped the sixth picture. She proceeded to gasp, and Amber froze, wondering _why_ she reacted that way:

The picture was of Loki and Amber, but it was rather unique. Amber had found some forgotten treasures while looking for Christmas decorations - face paint, and some ridiculous hats and wigs, and had of course proceeded to paint her face. She had managed a decent skull-look, and Loki had actually laughed when he saw her. She had insisted on painting his face as well, unsuccessfully, of course.

 _I don't need face paint, you insufferable thing,_ he had declared, and then shifted to his lovely frost giant shape. She had laughed, and the frost giant had been rather amused.

 _But I was going to take a festive picture,_ she had quipped, and to her surprise, he had asked her if he was not 'festive enough'.

And so, she had taken a picture with a blue-skinned, red-eyed Loki, and he had seemed surprisingly relaxed about the whole thing.

That was of course the picture Frigga was currently looking at, and Amber wondered what she was thinking. Was she repulsed by ‘the monster’? Or was this merely shock over seeing her son with blue skin, but not a look of self-hatred?

Frigga’s hand was shaking when she picked up the picture again. “I never imagined… How did this happen?”

“Well, we went from him trying to intimidate me when I accidentally mentioned that he was a frost giant, to this.”

“How?”

Amber shrugged. “He is still Loki, even with blue skin and red eyes. Skin colour is just skin colour – it does not change his personality. And he is rather fetching in blue, in my opinion.” She paused for a moment. “He is rarely on _that_ level of acceptance, though. I found face paint, and immediately went ahead and painted my face, because – well – I do these things. I then proceeded to fail at convincing him that he too needed face paint – because ‘I don’t need face paint, you insufferable thing’. He shifted, I laughed, and then melodramatically told him how he had just thwarted my plans of taking a ‘festive picture’. He asked if he was not festive enough – I was surprised, believe me – and then we took that picture.”

“He does not hate himself,” Frigga whispered. “Oh, Loki.”

“He frequently hates himself,” Amber replied. “But he is getting…mellower about it. It isn’t lodged into the core of him any longer. Not as much, at least.”

“I never imagined I would see the day.”

Amber smiled, then remembered she had one more picture, so she went to collect it.

“Here,” she said, softly. “I rather like this one.”

The picture was of Loki, and he was laughing. Really laughing.

“This was just a few days ago,” Amber continued, and then looked at the picture for a bit. “He is _extraordinary_ patient when it comes to me. But then again, I am rather patient with him as well. Even when he snaps at me for two days straight. It’s rather miraculous, the way we get along.” She paused for another moment. “He is working in a soup kitchen today. He feeds the homeless, literally. He hasn’t done that so far, so I’m curious how he is doing.”

Frigga was silent, and Amber realised she was fighting tears.

“He’s fine,” she said, quietly. “And he is genuinely looking for ways of making up for his mistakes – as far as that is possible.”

“I thought he was lost for us. I had…given up.”

“Someone just needed to find him again,” Amber said, and Frigga looked at her with tears in her eyes.

“Are you lovers?”

Amber’s eyes widened in surprise. “What? No!”

“I apologise,” Frigga said, shaking her head. “Looking at these pictures – you seem so…close.”

“That has more to do with who _I_ am, I think. I do not shy away from closeness. I think I almost gave him a heart-attack when I pounced on him and hugged him – twice – because I was so happy with the result on my essay. That’s who I am.”

“What about in the future?”

Amber just looked at Frigga, not certain whether it was a good idea to voice her fears to the woman.

“Whatever you tell me – it will stay with me.”

Amber gazed at her for another moment, but then she ran a hand through her hair, and sighed. “We live together. We go well together. _Very_ well together, strange as that is. And it…might get complicated. For me, at least. I’m trying really hard to keep within platonic areas, but it’s getting harder as time passes.”

“What hinders you?”

Amber shook her head. “First of all, I have no idea how _he_ feels about the whole thing. But by the off chance that we end up together – what if it ends badly? What will happen to him then?”

“Then I will come for my son,” Frigga said without hesitation. “And I will not allow another descent into darkness for him.”

Amber gave the woman a surprised look. “Wait. You _approve_ of this?”

Frigga nodded. “My son deserves happiness. He has many faults, made many mistakes, but that is not…” she paused. “The puzzle you pieced together in front of Odin – every word was true. Loki deserves…something. He deserves a chance at something different – something…”

“He deserves a place in the world where he is good enough, just the way he is.”

“Yes,” Frigga said, sadly. “Yes, he does. He has never been given a chance – never. And then you came. You rare, beautiful soul. If you can make him happy… I would like for my son to be happy. And if it all goes awry, I will not waver. Not this time. _Not anymore.”_

Amber truly believed her, and it made something inside her thaw.

She almost jumped when her phone rang.

"It's Loki," she said, and picked up the phone. "Hello?"

 _"Hello,"_ he replied, and she instantly heard the jaded tone in his voice.

"I can practically _hear_  how you are _radiating_ sarcasm. What's wrong?"

_"Nothing is wrong, exactly. But I had the choice of telling my fellow volunteer exactly how I feel about him, or I could tell you. I chose you."_

"Wise choice, probably. What is he doing?"

_"He is attempting to convince me that I need Jesus in my life."_

Amber couldn't help herself. She burst out laughing. "That is the most ironic thing I have heard in a very long time."

_"Indeed. I am at this point tempted to flash red eyes and whisper something ominous about Lucifer."_

"Sweet Merlin, he would never recover."

_"He is very taken with the fact that it is Christmas - the time to celebrate Jesus."_

"Did you tell him Jesus is born in March?"

 _"I did not,"_ Loki replied, and his tone was amused now. _"But you can be certain I will."_

"Sounds good. How is your day - other than the man trying to convert you to Christianity, I mean?"

There was a pause. _"I gave away my coat."_

Her voice softened. "Did you, really? I understand. I think I would have done the same. Although - _Loki!_ It's almost zero degrees! You are outside! Frost giant or no - you need to wear a coat. Next you know, the eager man trying to convert you will declare you a miracle."

_"You are insufferable."_

"And you are impossible. I honestly understand why you gave away your coat. But how many odd looks have you attracted so far?"

_“A few.”_

“And by a few, you mean a whole lot? And you are still going to be there for what – five hours?”

_“More or less, yes.”_

“I will come by in a little while with a coat.”

There was a pause. _“I think that would be a good idea. It just started snowing.”_

She rolled her eyes. “I am rolling my eyes. But all right. I will come by soon.”

 _“Thank you,”_ he said before pausing. _“I did not exactly see any other option than giving him the coat.”_

“Yeah,” she said, softly. “I do not doubt that. But I will stop by soon. Pretend to be cold in the meantime.”

 _“I will,”_ he said, but then paused. _“I have to go. He is trying to tell the whole crowd that Jesus is the cure to everything.”_

“Tell him Jesus is born in March.”

_“Believe me, I will. Until later.”_

“Bye,” she said, and hung up.

“Was that truly my son you spoke to?”

Amber looked at Frigga, finding the woman looking at her with wide eyes.

“Well, yes.”

“It is one thing to hear you tell me about him – it is different to listen to a conversation like that. What did he say to you, when you mentioned frost giants?”

“He told me I am insufferable.”

Frigga just shook her head.

-o-

Frigga left a little while later, and she asked Amber to not tell Loki she had been there. She had intended on answering Amber’s request of advice, not to get details of her son – not in that way. Frigga would return soon – to visit Loki, and eventually Amber had agreed. Frigga was so afraid that her son would not react well to the news of her visiting without him being there, even though her intentions had been good.

Sighing, Amber put on her jacket, grabbed one of Loki’s coats from the wardrobe, checked that she had her car keys, and ventured out to deliver a coat to the frost giant.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	12. Humans. Strange Creatures.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 12, people!
> 
> So, what do you think about Frigga? I love Frigga. Not to mention - Loki loves Frigga. And it's about time someone stands up for him. 
> 
> I am still utterly humbled, and crazy-happy-thankful for your feedback on this story! Thank you!
> 
> Disclaimer: not mine.

 

-o-

 

Two days later, Loki returned home before Amber for once. He disliked returning home before Amber. The flat felt empty – quiet. Too quiet.

He ventured into the kitchen to find something to eat, but stopped when he saw the fridge.

_These are going on the fridge!_ Amber had declared, but he had not taken her seriously. Nor had he completely understood what she meant by 'going on the fridge'. Looking at the fridge now, however, he realised what she had meant, and that she had, in fact, been serious.

He froze when he noticed the picture of himself with blue skin. He just stood there for a long moment, staring at the picture, trying to sort out the inner turmoil of emotions.

Amber did not mind. Not in any form or way did she mind. It was not even a case of ‘tolerate’. She _accepted_ him – even with blue skin and red eyes. Because _‘you are still you – blue skin or otherwise. You are Loki. And that is what matters.’_

And so, there was a picture of him – blue skin and all – on the fridge, as if it made no difference.

Because it made no difference to Amber.

He noticed a picture of himself – he was laughing. Laughing, because Amber made him laugh. It was surreal, somehow.

And he was drifting slowly but surely away from the safe haven named 'platonic'.

She was human - mortal - and... And that didn't matter to him. 

_She does not return your feelings. Let it go._

He could not exactly let it go, now could he? Having her around made it practically impossible.

But she did not return his feelings. He would just have to bury his emotions somewhere - somewhere they would not hurt so much the day this ended. Because it would. In one way or another - it would not last. Nothing lasted. At least nothing good.

_Sentiment,_ he thought, turning away from the fridge and the pictures. _Have you not learned? Sentiment makes you weak._

Those pictures... He didn't recognise himself. They were not him.

Except...they were him. But that was long ago. Before he learned who he was, before he learned the truth.

He had thought that part of him to be lost. Apparently, it wasn't.

-o-

"I am invited to a Christmas party," Amber said later that day while they were eating dinner. "At the university. And I have to go - more or less."

There was something odd in her voice that made him look at her. "Yes?"

"And well, there is one of my classmates - Allen - I..."

She trailed off, and Loki could feel his blood go cold, and there was a painful twinge in his chest.

Allen. That was the name of the thing that would end this. Of course he should have expected this - but he had not, fool that he was.

Allen.

Something darkened inside him, and he couldn't even speak - he just looked at her.

"I was wondering if you wanted to come. I keep talking about you, and Allen now at the point where he rolls his eyes every time I mention you. So, well, basically, he would like to meet you."

Of all the possible outcomes of this conversation – this was not one of the ones he had considered.

“If you do not feel like it, I understand. And if you don’t want me to go either, that is fine. I _should_ , though, because Allen and I team up at every party.” Amber was nervous, he realised, but he still didn’t know what to say, so he just listened to her as she continued. “Well, Allen is gay, and there is a girl in my class who insists on ‘showing him what he is missing’, and that ‘he hasn’t met the right girl yet’. I tried to tell her perhaps she had not met ‘the right llama yet’, and how could she know she was truly heterosexual if she had not met the right llama? She didn’t even understand what I was saying. Anyway, that’s why we team up. Allen hides – because no matter what he says, she ignores him – and I confuse her to the point where she leaves again. Point is – he will hate me if I don’t show up, and I would really like it if you came with me.”

Allen was apparently gay, just to top it off. Realising that, Loki emerged from his dark place and merely nodded. “All right.”

Suddenly, she was beaming. He would never understand why these things made her _this_ happy.

“Really? Thank you.”

He would never understand this woman.

-o-

Allen turned out to be rather tolerable. He did not do mindless chatter, and he was quick-witted and slightly sarcastic, which suited Loki well. Even if Amber was absent for a moment – currently getting more drinks.

He watched her walk away – he had a very hard time _not_ watching her tonight – and inwardly sighed. This woman would be the end of him, surely.

She was wearing a black dress that reached just over her knees, and it clung to her curves in all the right places. Her hair was soft curls, and her eyes practically glowed with happiness.

Loki inwardly sighed again.

He tensed when he saw a man approach her – it was rather obvious what the man was thinking – and she stopped, smiling politely.

He heard Allen chuckle next to him. “Amber is glorious. Just watch.”

Loki did not know what that meant, but watched nevertheless. He had to stop himself from rushing from his chair when the leech of a man moved his hand – obviously intending on putting it somewhere he shouldn’t.

“Aaaand, action!” Allen said, and that was when Amber grabbed the man’s arm, twisted it in a way that looked most uncomfortable, and then proceeded to say something. Whatever she said made the man scurry away, and Loki relaxed again.

“They never learn,” Allen said, chuckling. “Amber will break their nose before allowing them anywhere near her.”

Loki liked to hear that. He really did.

“I am sorry about what is about to happen,” Allen continued, and Loki was puzzled for a moment before noticing a woman heading his way.

“Well, hello,” the woman said as she reached them. “You I have not seen here before.”

Loki honestly did not know what to do. These were Amber’s friends, and he supposed being rude was not something she would appreciate.

“I am Lucy,” the woman continued as she sat down on the chair next to him. “And who are you?”

He raised an eyebrow. “Loki.”

“Well, _lovely_ to meet you, Loki.”

Suddenly, there was a hand on his thigh, and he was about to explain exactly how he felt about that hand when there was an angry hiss from behind the woman.

“You have five seconds to remove those fingers from Loki’s thigh, Lucy,” Amber hissed angrily. “Or I break every single one of them.”

Lucy pulled her hand away as if burned, but did not know how to quit. “I didn’t hear any complaints from _him.”_

“That is because he is kind enough to figure out whether or not you are a friend of mine before deciding his approach. Currently, you are not my friend.”

Loki sighed in relief. “In that case – I do believe that is Amber’s chair.”

The woman merely huffed, but moved away.

-o-

The evening was rather interesting, if he was to tell the truth. He was currently watching people ‘dancing’. ‘Slow-dancing’, apparently. This involved holding each other while spinning around on spot. Well, not spinning. Rotating in a ridiculously slow pace, more like it.

Humans. Strange creatures.

One of said strange creatures was moving toward him, holding two colourful drinks while sporting a happy smile.

Before he knew it, said strange creature was on his lap, and he automatically put his arms around her. He proceeded to raise an eyebrow, which resulted in an amused laugh from her.

"Would you care for a colourful drink - complete with a tiny umbrella?"

He eyed the drink suspiciously. "I would rather avoid it, I believe."

She chuckled. "Acceptable."

He was about to say something, but then Allen appeared from nowhere, sporting a mischievous smile. He held something over them, and grinned even wider. "Mistletoe!"

Loki had absolutely no idea what that meant, but luckily, Allen cleared it up right away. "That means you have to kiss!"

Loki froze, waiting for whatever would happen next. He would...he would like to kiss the woman on his lap. Very much so.

She did not exactly want to kiss him, however, because she gave Allen a jaded look. "Allen..."

He should not be surprised. He was not surprised, when he thought about it. It hurt, nevertheless. Because he was a fool.

"Amber! Just kiss the man, for gods' sake. You talk about him constantly. Don't try to tell me you don't want to kiss him."

Amber hesitated, and then turned to look at Loki, gazing at him with searching eyes.

He didn't know if she found what she was looking for, but he knew his breath hitched, and that the world seemed to fade out when she moved - and her lips met his.

It was all too short, however, because she pulled back, looking at him again with those searching eyes.

He wished he knew what she was searching for.

She was so close still, mere inches from him - he couldn't quite help himself. He pulled her closer, and their lips met again.

And he - as always - regretted his actions.

But then, the world faded out again when Amber didn’t pull away from him – rather the opposite. She melted into the kiss, her arms came up around his neck, and she let out a small sigh as her lips parted – so did his – and their tongues met.

Time ceased to matter, the world ceased to exist, and when Amber eventually pulled back again, everything was different. There was a new kind of softness in her eyes, and he suspected his eyes were equally soft. He gazed at her, tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, and felt her fingers play with his hair.

Allen was still standing next to them. Loki couldn’t care less.

“I would _pay_ to have someone look at me like that for five bloody minutes,” Allen declared, and then promptly walked away.

Amber cocked her head, gazing at him. “Want to go home?”

Her words held so many unspoken promises that Loki briefly forgot how to breathe. 

Loki nodded, and Amber gave him a soft smile - a new kind of softness, Loki noted -  and the smile was still on her face as collected their coats before heading for the exit.

Amber took his hand, and didn't let go until they got home. Loki found he didn't mind.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	13. Tree-Browsing

 

-o-

 

He woke up the next morning, and instantly realised something was different. It took him a moment to realise what exactly that was, however.

Amber.

Memories of the previous evening came back to him in a rush. The kiss, the walk home, and then… Naked skin, soft moans, and his name…his name, in whispers, at first, but then – a cry of his name as she came undone.

They had fallen asleep – entangled limbs and entwined fingers – and he had barely believed it was true.

It was true, however, because she was still here – naked skin flush against his body. She was sleeping still, and her soft breathing tickled his neck.

He couldn’t quite believe it. He didn’t actually _dare_ believe it just yet, not until she woke up and told him that she wanted this as well.

He turned to his side – facing her – and pulled her closer. She sighed in her sleep as she tilted her head back. If she opened her eyes, he would look right into his.

He lay there for a bit, studying the sleeping woman. By the nine realms, he wanted her to wake up and tell him she wanted him as well. That she would be his, and that this thing – them – was right.

He brushed a lock of hair away from her face, and kissed her nose, resulting in a slight frown. He had tickled her, apparently.

He kissed her nose again, and that was when she opened her eyes – he held his breath – and the first thing she did was to kiss him. In the next moment, she pulled back, and he met a pair of wide eyes. Eyes filled with questions.

To hell with it, he decided, and just kissed her. She melted in his arms, and the world ceased to exist again.

-o-

After spending quite a while in bed, they got up, and Loki showered before walking into the kitchen, finding her there – like every day.

It was unsettling, gave him a feeling that nothing had changed. Perhaps nothing _had_ changed? Perhaps that was just a one-time thing? He didn’t think so, but he didn’t exactly have the best experience in such things – or life in general. Things did not work out for him.

He sat at the table, trying to convince himself that she would not do something like that. She would – he did not quite know what she would do, but she would let him know in some way, if this was not what she wanted. If she did not want a true commitment.

And then, she changed everything.

“How do you want your bacon, love? Ridiculously close to raw, or charcoal?"

She had never used endearments before. He let out a relieved breath. 

"Charcoal?" he asked, amused.

She picked up the plate on the counter next to her, and turned toward him. "This," she said and picked up a piece of bacon. She proceeded to crush it between two fingers, and raised an eyebrow. "Bacon-dust is on the menu as well. Apparently."

"How very exotic."

She chuckled as she turned toward the oven again. "I like that description. I shall, however, try again.”

-o-

"Loki, love," he heard her voice yell from somewhere in the flat later that day. "Could you please come here and do some manly lifting?"

He chuckled as he put down the book he was reading, and went to find her.

She was in the storage room, trying to manhandle a box - unsuccessfully.

"This thing," she said, and poked the box. "It's not being very cooperative. I have no idea how I managed to get this up there in the first place."

He took a hold of the box - lifting it down without effort, and she gave him an amused look. "Thank you, love."

She proceeded to give him a quick kiss before focusing on the box.

He was more or less constantly surprised over the fact that she kept kissing him, using different endearments for him, and then go back to - whatever she was doing.

Something had shifted in Amber. She acted exactly the same, and completely different.

He was still trying to get used to the fact that he could touch her without having a particular reason for it other than because he merely felt like it.

Oh, he'd had lovers before. Countless lovers. But not like this. Things were different in Asgard. Love did not mean the same as it did here.

And he had not been with anyone he wanted to touch all the time - merely to touch, nothing else.

In Asgard he would have considered this to be a weakness, in a way. To need someone, that was a weakness. And people would eventually exploit that weakness.

But Amber was different. He could touch her - just to touch her. He could stand behind her when she cooked, and he could have his arms around her, just because it felt good.

And she did the same as him - she touched him whenever he was within touching-distance, basically. He found it surreal. Because never had anyone - _anyone_ \- wanted to touch him in such a way.

-o-

She had decided to join him in the shower - something he fully approved of. She hesitated, however, and he gave her a puzzled look. "What?"

She sighed. "Perhaps I'm overstepping some line I don't know of, but my curiosity is getting the better of me. Do you turn blue..." She gestured up and down. "Everywhere?"

He paused, trying to figure out how he felt about this. She had not been appalled by his frost giant shape, but it was something different entirely - seeing the whole picture.

He would show her at some point, he assumed as much, so why not get it over with?

He didn't look at her when he shifted. He didn't want to see her eyes, in case they did not show that complete acceptance she had showed so far.

He heard a small gasp - in amazement or disgust, he didn't know - and then there was a long moment of silence.

But then, he felt soft fingers brush over his chest, and he finally dared look at her.

She was not looking at him - not his face, anyway. She was occupied with studying him, something that had made him feel extremely uncomfortable, had it not been for the awe in her eyes.

She was not appalled. She was awestruck.

An amused smile appeared on her face, and she finally met his eyes. "You are an extremely fascinating man," she said, smiling at him. "And breathtakingly beautiful."

 _Breathtakingly beautiful._ That was how she saw him in his frost giant shape. 

Loki couldn't quite breathe.

Her hand came up, brushing his cheek, and then she stretched up, and kissed him.

A moment later, she was smiling at him, and then proceeded to turn on the water, squeaking when it was cold.

Humming, she adjusted the water, and didn't even look at him - as if he wasn't standing there like a human-shaped blueberry - complete with devil eyes.

Apparently happy with the water, she smiled at him again.

"Do you truly not mind?"

The question came out before he could stop himself, and he felt extremely vulnerable.

She shook her head. "I truly don't mind. I wouldn't mind if your regular colour was blue. Would have been inconvenient - considering people would react to a blue person walking around, but it would be perfectly fine with me."

He did not know what to say, so he merely embraced her instead.

-o-

Amber was at the university, but he had the day off, so he was sitting in the sofa with a book on his lap, relaxing.

Until there was a flash of light, of course.

He was on the floor in a heartbeat, completely ready for...anything.

He was terrified as well. Terrified, because this was the moment where it all fell apart.

He walked slowly toward the kitchen, and peeked inside.

The sight that met him was not what he had expected.

Frigga.

She was not looking at him, however. She was looking at the fridge. 

"Mother," he said without thinking. Although, who was he trying to fool? She was his mother, was she not?

Frigga looked at him, and there were tears in her eyes. "Loki," she said, breathlessly. "How I have missed you."

He didn't push her away when she embraced him, and it made her let out an almost strangled sound.

She took a step back, and gazed at him for a long moment with searching eyes, as if she could find the answers to her questions in his eyes.

"Will you tell me how you fare?" she eventually asked, and the hopeful tone in her voice made him want to just give in, and drop the pretences.

He had always been close to his mother. She had been one of the very few people he shared his thoughts with. And she had been the _only_ one he shared his most inner thoughts with. In those quiet, peaceful moment he shared with Frigga, Loki was not the God of Lies. He was merely Loki.

"I will not breathe a word to Odin - nor anyone else, if you wish. I swear to you."

After gazing at her for another long moment, Loki sighed.

"Would you care for a cup of tea?"

"Yes, please."

-o-

He had no idea where to begin. So he told her as much.

She gestured at the fridge. "You could tell me about the pictures?"

He looked at the pictures. "That one," he said, pointing at the one of Amber and him with wild hair and swirling snowflakes around them. "Is from when we were suddenly ambushed by snow and wind. And Amber decided that the moment needed documentation, for reasons unknown."

"That one," he continued, pointing at the one of him in the sofa. "Is another 'this moment needs to be documented' merely because I looked peaceful."

"That one," he said, pointing at the one of Amber. "Is when Amber tried to bake with food colouring. The colours are extremely strong - you need no more than a drop to colour an entire cake. I have no idea how she managed to get everything on her face, however. And considering how everything I do needs to be 'documented' I decided to return the favour. She tried to disagree."

"That one," he said, pointing at the one of Amber and him with garlands in their hair. "Is a case of me having no idea of how utterly insufferable the woman is."

"That one..." he trailed off, looking at the picture of himself laughing. "It is rather clear what that is."

"The last one..." He shook his head. "Is a moment of insanity. She strolled into the living room like that, and then tried to convince me I needed to be as festive as her. I pointed out that I do not need face paint to be 'festive'." He paused. "She has read it all - all the scary stories to scare children. Even as a child, she read them. And still..."

"She does not mind."

Loki shook his head. "She does not."

“Why are they…there? And not framed?”

He couldn’t help but look amused. “This is a human thing. Amber frequently declares ‘this is going on the fridge’. I am yet to figure out what exactly decides what is suitable to ‘go on the fridge’ and not.”

“It seems…careless. To not take better care of them."

Loki shook his head. “I will show you,” he said, and then picked up his phone, found the camera, and leaned in to take a selfie with his mother.

And if that wasn’t the most hilarious thing to happen this century, he did not know what was.

He smirked. “Smile.”

She looked puzzled, but smiled, and he took the picture. “Now,” he said, pushing some buttons, (Amber did this so often that he had learned how it worked) and heard the sound of the printer in the hall. “Wait a moment.”

He fetched the picture, and went back into the kitchen, placing the picture on the table in front of his mother.

She stared at the picture before gingerly picking it up. Her hands were shaking. Her lower lip was almost trembling. A tear escaped her eye, and she brushed it off with the back of her hand.

“Please,” she almost whispered, “allow me to keep it.”

He had not been prepared for the emotional reaction from his mother, and looked at her with surprise, realising he could not take the picture from her. “You may keep it,” he said, and another tear escaped Frigga’s eye.

They sat there for a bit, only to be interrupted when Amber called. He decided to answer.

“Hello?”

_“Hello, love. How is your day?”_

Her tone was overly light, and he rolled her eyes. “Out with it.”

He could hear her laugh. So he was right, then. She wanted something.

_“I was wondering if I could convince you to go Christmas tree shopping.”_

“Pardon?”

_“Christmas tree. We need a Christmas tree.”_

“You are planning on bringing a tree into the house.”

_“Most definitely. With or without your help. I am currently tree-browsing, but they are...somewhat of an inconvenient size.”_

“You are tree-browsing,” he deadpanned. “That is ridiculous.”

_“Be happy I don’t drag you into the woods to chop down a tree ourselves.”_

“Consider me happy. Now, let me see if I understand this correctly. We are buying a pine tree, so we can place it in the living room.”

_“See? You got it. And then I will be frequently annoyed by all the pine needles everywhere because I have to vacuum all the time. And then we will just throw out the tree after New Year.”_

“How delightful.”

_“I know you would see reason. Now, will you, or will you not assist me in purchasing a pine tree when convenient?”_

He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I will assist you in purchasing a pine tree when convenient.”

_“Thank you! Will you also assist me in decorating said pine tree?”_

“Absolutely not.”

She laughed. _“Very well. There will be climbing. Will you catch me if I fall?”_

“Always,” he said softly, and then they said goodbye.

He had momentarily forgotten Frigga’s presence, and froze when he realised she was looking at him. Studying him, more like it. He sat there, frozen on spot, for a long moment.

Sentiment. That was the general theme of everything he did these days. Sentiment. And sentiment was definitely a weakness.

In the end, he realised he did not actually mind _that_ much, and he raised an eyebrow. “I am apparently crucial in the event that is purchasing a pine tree. Would you like to come?”

Frigga stared at him. First in pure disbelief, but then her expression changed, and he could see something akin to excitement in her eyes.

“Yes,” she said, and then paused, cocking her head as she gazed at him. “Are you lovers?”

The bluntness of the question had him taken aback for a moment, but then he sighed. “Yes. It is a recent development."

“Good,” she simply said, and it made Loki pause. “I mean it,” she continued. “Good.”

"And what of the Allfather? Will he agree, do you think?"

He didn't know why he asked. He did not care whether Odin approved or not. But...he wanted to see Frigga's reaction to the question.

"Believe me, he will," Frigga said with steel in her voice. "And if not, I will poke out his remaining eye."

Loki stared at his mother for a long moment.

 _Just when I thought the world could get no stranger,_ he thought, shook his head, and went to fetch clothes for his mother.

-o-

He had called Amber to tell her Frigga would be accompanying them, and she had declared 'the more, the merrier' in an enthusiastic voice, something he had chuckled at.

They found the pine tree-market, and Loki found the whole situation completely hilarious. And surreal.

It did not take them long before they found Amber, and she beamed when she saw them.

Frigga was actually faster than him, and promptly walked over to the beaming woman, embracing her.

Amber looked slightly taken aback, but smiled softly at Frigga.

He reached them, and raised an eyebrow. "Tree-browsing."

Amber grinned. "Obviously," she said before giving him a chaste kiss. She stepped back and gestured behind her. "This way!"

He watched as Amber practically bounced away, and he glanced at his mother, finding her looking at Amber in fascination.

"She is rather a force of nature, is she not?"

Loki chuckled. "That she is."

-o-

They found a tree after a whole lot of ‘tree-browsing’, and Amber was thrilled. It was ridiculous how happy this woman managed to get over something as simple as a tree.

Frigga looked at Amber more or less constantly, not that he blamed her. Amber was quite frankly rather interesting to observe when in this mood, and it was rather fascinating, the way she managed to move along like a small tornado, while at the same time being perfectly polite to everyone around her. She was all genuine smiles and thank yous. She even managed to tie the shoes of a small child on her way through, return said child to his mother, and then she was off again – tree-browsing.

-o-

They returned home – tree and all – and Loki, while rolling his eyes rather frequently, manhandled the tree inside, and placed it in the Christmas tree foot.

Amber placed her hands on her hips, gazing at the tree. “All it needs is some overly cheery decorations and an excessive amount of garlands, and it will be perfect. Tomorrow, I think. You are welcome to come, Frigga, should you wish.”

Frigga smiled. “I would like that. Thank you for the invitation.”

-o-

Loki was in the kitchen when Frigga entered a little while later. “I must take my leave,” she said, and the way her eyes flickered to the pictures on the fridge did not escape his notice. “This has been…wonderful. Thank you.”

Frigga smiled, and then her eyes flickered to the pictures again. Loki sighed, and walked over to the fridge, plucked all the pictures off the surface, and handed them to his mother. “Just...take them."

Frigga’s eyes filled with tears as she accepted the pictures. She held them as if they were a most amazing treasure, and looked at Loki. “Thank you. Shall I keep them to myself?”

Loki sighed as he considered this. He didn't quite know what to say. She obviously wanted to show them to Odin, something Loki had very mixed feelings about. How would the Allfather react to a picture of him with blue skin?

Picturing the shocked expression on Odin's face made Loki decide.

Sighing, he rolled his eyes. "Do as you please."

A moment later, he found himself in his mother’s embrace, and then she was gone again, in a flash of light.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	14. In Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 14! Woop!
> 
> Let's stop by Asgard, shall we? :) Yes, let's.
> 
> Disclaimer: ain't mine, yo!

 

-o-

 

Frigga had to find a quiet place when she returned to Asgard. She had to think. Process.

She did not know how long she had been sitting there when Odin entered the room.

“You were away for some time,” he said warily. “And now you are lost in thought. I am not certain whether that is a good, or a bad thing.”

“Come, husband,” Frigga said and patted the spot next to her on the sofa. “Come sit, and I will tell you.”

Odin came over and sat down, gazing at her. "Is it good news? How is Loki?"

"He is well," Frigga said, and saw Odin relax slightly. "I have much to tell you, but I would like to show you something first."

She had already placed the pictures in the order she wanted to show him, and put them face down so he would not see the next picture accidentally.

First, she gave him the picture of Loki in the sofa.

"He looks...calm."

"Indeed," Frigga said. "He is."

She let Odin look at the picture for a bit before giving him the next one. "Not only is he calm. He has found patience, and tolerance."

Odin actually smiled, looking at the picture. This is Amber's work? The food?"

"Indeed. She is truly something."

She handed him the next picture - this one of Amber. "Loki has taken this picture."

She quickly explained why Amber looked the way she did, and Odin chuckled.

She handed him the one of Loki and Amber with garlands in their hair next, and Odin chuckled again. "He has indeed found patience."

Next was the one of Loki and Amber in the wind and snow, and something softened in Odin's face when he saw it.

"Look, husband," she almost whispered when she handed him the next. The one where Loki laughed.

Odin gazed at the picture as if it was something foreign. "He is...happy?"

Frigga nodded. "He is. Not only is he happy, I believe he is...changing."

She handed him the picture of Loki with red eyes and blue skin, and Odin inhaled sharply. "I never thought this could be. I never imagined."

Frigga explained the backstory to the picture, and Odin shook his head. "How...surreal."

Frigga nodded. "And this is him today."

Odin gingerly took the picture from her - the picture of Loki and Frigga.

"And tomorrow I am invited to the event that is decorating the Christmas tree."

Odin looked puzzled, so she laughed, and explained. Everything. How Loki had called her mother, how he had spoken freely, how he had smiled, and how different he had been. She then recited the phone call from Amber as well as she could, and then told her husband all about their journey to purchase a tree. She talked about Amber - how she had managed to return a lost child in the midst of it all, how attentive she had been to everything and everyone, and how fascinating it had been to watch.

“I told Amber ‘I thought he was lost for us. I had given up’ and she replied – as if it was the most natural thing in the world – ‘someone just needed to find him again’.”

“And she has found him,” Odin said quietly. “Are they…lovers?”

“Yes.”

“I thought so – looking at the pictures…”

Frigga shook her head. “No. They were not lovers as of yet – not on any of these pictures. It is very recent. And it is not a mere infatuation. There is something more there. And she accepts him – for everything he is. She wouldn’t mind if his regular skin colour was blue. ‘You are you – you are Loki – and that is all that matters’ I think her expression was. And the way she speaks to him… I heard her call to him today. ‘Loki, dear, would you be so kind as to bring your supernatural strength over here for thirty seconds? My frail, mortal arms will not do.’ He chuckled as he went to her, and then I heard a soft ‘thank you, love’.”

“Frail, mortal arms indeed,” Odin said, and then gazed at Frigga for a long moment. “We shall consider that – in time.”

“Yes,” Frigga agreed. "In time."

 

 

 

 


	15. Fragile Beings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 15, yay!
> 
> Seriously, guys! You're the loveliest people in the entire world, I swear! The feedback I get from this story is just amazing! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!
> 
> Now, let's get on with it, shall we?
> 
> Disclaimer: not mine, promise!

-o-

 

Loki was walking around with Amber, lost in thought. Had he done the right thing - telling his mother everything? Had he made a mistake in doing so?

"What's on your mind, love?"

He gazed at the woman next to him. "I am thinking about my mother. Giving her those pictures...Odin has surely seen them now."

Amber nodded. "And what do you think about that?"

"That is what I am trying to figure out."

"I am willing to bet my right arm that he cried."

"Pardon?"

"You heard me. He is not exactly father of the year material, but I am willing to bet my right arm that he cried.”

“You are a very strange woman.”

She chuckled, and then got promptly sidetracked by a pet store, because apparently 'oh my god, that's an adorable bird!'

She was a very strange woman, indeed.

-o-

Frigga actually showed up, and Amber was happy for it. She didn’t even mind that Loki got a phone call, asking him to help out in the soup kitchen for an hour or so.

“I will be back in a while,” Loki said quietly as he put her arms around her. “Will you be all right here?”

Amber nodded as she tucked a lock of hair behind his ear. “Your mother is lovely. We will be fine. Go go, feed the hungry. Try to not give away your coat this time. Bring a spare coat, if so.”

He chuckled. “I will attempt to restrain myself.”

“Also, do not allow anyone to convince you that you need Jesus in your life.”

He actually laughed outright this time. “I will do my very best.”

“I will see you in a while, love.”

“Mmmh,” he said, kissed her, and left the flat.

Amber walked back into the living room, and smiled at Frigga. "He will be back in a little while. Would you like some tea?"

Frigga nodded.

-o-

"I think he misses his brother," Amber said a while later. "He speaks of Odin without a clenched jaw at this point, but he barely mentions Thor."

"And that makes you think he misses him?"

Amber nodded. "I might be wrong. But there is no reason - not as such - for him to avoid talking about Thor. If Odin is a somewhat safe subject, Thor should be as well."

"You might be right," Frigga said, and paused for a moment. "I showed Odin the pictures."

Amber gazed at the woman for a bit. "Did he cry?"

Frigga looked utterly perplexed, telling Amber she was correct.

"I had a feeling he might."

Frigga gazed at her for a bit, as if she was trying to find some answers in Amber's face. "You are wise beyond your years, Amber."

Amber actually blushed. "Thank you."

-o-

A while later, they had somehow landed on the subject of immortality, and Amber was rather lost in thought when she spoke. “It must be wonderful, being able to live forever. But it must be tiresome as well.”

“Why would you say that?”

“It must be wonderful having unlimited time. All the knowledge one can acquire, all the things one can learn. One can say ‘I want to master every instrument in the world’ and actually have _time_ to do that. There are so many things I would love to learn, but I literally do not have time to do so, even if I will live for another seventy years. If I am lucky. I have to focus on the things most important to me, the things that make me happy. Human lives are fleeting – a mere blink in the bigger picture. I would love to live forever. But then there is the other side of living forever. Since one has unlimited time, perhaps it is that much easier to think ‘that thing, I shall do that thing at a later date. I have time’. Perhaps it is easier to end up stagnant than in a short lifespan. Not to mention the losses one feels during such a long lifespan.”

“How so?”

She shrugged. “Imagine if Loki and I stay together – eventually, I will die. He will not. I will be old and grey, and he will be young and immortal. Wow, that is a disturbing mental image. Point is – he will lose me. I would not like to trade places with him there.”

“Do you believe you will stay together?”

Amber thought about this for a moment. “I choose to be realistic about these things. The whole ‘happily forever after’ thing is not very realistic. That does not make it _impossible,_ however. My first encounter with Loki was…dark. He positively radiated insanity – and yet, when he asked me what I thought – if he was evil – I honestly told him I did not know. It then took me less than a minute to realise that something was not right – that sceptre… something was just not right. I do not know what prompted it, but he stared at me after I told him I did not know, and then something flickered in his blue eyes. Suddenly, they turned green, and before I knew it, I was thrown through the air – away from him. Basically, he saved me from himself. I came across him two more times – he saved me from himself every time.”

“I did not know this.”

"The second time I came across him, he had his sceptre aimed at me, but then he recognised me. His whole body shook with the effort, but his eyes turned green, and he told me through clenched teeth to run. Third time, he looked at me with green eyes and told me 'you have three minutes to get as far away from me as possible.' I proceeded to pat his hand and tell him it was going to be all right. I still have no idea what made me do that."

She shook her head before continuing. "I left my wallet behind. That was how he was able to find me after it was all over."

"He deliberately sought you out?"

She nodded. "It is all rather strange, is it not? I found him outside my door, and the first thing I did was to manhandle him inside when I heard a neighbour down the hall. I think I spent first twenty four hours wondering why I did not call the government. And I think he spent said twenty four hours wondering why he believed me when I said I would not call the government."

Frigga gazed at her for a long moment. "It is rather strange, indeed."

“As to answer your question; something clicked in place with Loki – for me, at least. On a whole new and strange level. And I will fight to keep it that way. I will fight for him. Does that answer your question? More or less?”

Frigga nodded. “It does."

Amber smiled. "All right. Now, do you mind if I begin decorating the tree while we talk? It takes some time."

"Not at all," Frigga said, and Amber got up to find the pretty, shiny things.

-o-

Loki returned a while later, just as Amber was standing on a chair to reach the branches higher up.

Loki greeted his mother, but then he noticed her, and promptly gave her a jaded look. "I'm away for less than two hours, and of course you have to climb every rickety chair there is."

Amber glanced at him, one eyebrow raised. "Hello to you as well. The chair is not rickety. And I survived nine months in Afghanistan - there's a raging war going on there - so I think I can handle standing on a chair. Also, I would survive falling off said chair."

She glanced at him again - expecting him to look annoyed. He did not. He looked slightly worried, and that was when she realised he was somewhat serious.

She sighed, climbed down from the chair, and walked over to him. She gave him a quick kiss, straightened his shirt, and ventured into the kitchen to make some more tea.

-o-

He knew he was being ridiculous. She would survive falling off that chair. The problem was - he'd had a realisation lately, of how frail the mortals really were. He had watched the people in the soup kitchen. The people who came there because they had no food, no home, and no...nothing. They had nothing.

Today, there had been a woman around Amber's age, and she had been missing three fingers, the tip of her nose, and her skin looked like it was about to just peel off at any second.

The reason? She had no home, and the weather was cold. That was how frail humans were. Fingers and skin and whatnot fell off on their own accord, just because the weather was cold.

And so, when he came home to see Amber balancing on that chair...well, there had been a whole lot of scenarios going through his head - none of them good.

And he knew it was ridiculous. He worried anyway.

He heard Amber humming from the kitchen, and the sound made something in him relax.

"She is right, you know."

He rolled his eyes. "Yes, mother, I know. But did you know that human fingers merely falls off on their own accord if the weather is too cold too long? The fingers literally freeze - the flesh dies, then they turn black, and then they fall off. It is aptly named frostbite."

Frigga looked slightly unsettled. "No, I did not know. That is...unsettling."

"Indeed. Fragile beings."

Frigga looked rather lost in thought after that.

-o-

Eventually, the tree was decorated, Loki himself had actually helped somewhat, merely because the infernal woman insisted on balancing chairs left and right.

When they went to bed that night, Loki curled himself around the woman - inwardly sighing because he was acting like a fool.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't like to make Loki so - hm, what to call it - needy? Maybe that's not the correct word, but nevertheless, I don't really like writing him that way. But he's on quite the emotional journey at the moment, so that had to happen at some point. He won't stay like that for long, though! 


	16. I Just Wanted You To Know

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 16, totally! 
> 
> Disclaimer: ain't mine, sadly!

 

-o-

 

Three days before Christmas Eve, and Amber was going slightly nuts. The reason was the God of Mischief. He was suddenly overprotective, and even if she understood his reasons, this could not continue. Because he was _changing._ And she did not want him to change – not like that.

And so, she was sitting alone in the kitchen, lost in thought.

Loki had gone from badass prince of Asgard, and then world-conqueror – almost, and now he was domestic-man extraordinaire – feeding the poor and the homeless.

And that was _not him._ Not that he could really quit volunteering, nor being domestic, but that did not mean that had to be the _only_ thing he did.

He was the bloody God of Mischief. His brain was able to go hundred miles a minute, he was brilliant, passionate, strong, and _fierce._ But now… his brilliant, fierce mind did not get a challenge. Other than _her_ that was, and that was just not enough. He needed something to ignite a spark in him.

She hadn't seen him use magic in ages. And he _loved_ his magic.

She sighed, and looked at the ceiling. "Heimdall? If you can hear me - could you mention to Frigga that Loki has not used magic in a very long time? And that he is currently soup-kitchen-domestic-man-extraordinaire? He needs something more to occupy his mind, but I'm somewhat at a loss."

-o-

She heard him come home, and went to greet him. He looked tired, she realised when she saw him. He looked...weary.

Something had to change, indeed.

"Hello, love," she said, and he gave her a small smile as he shrugged off his jacket. Next came the shoes, and then he walked toward her, putting his arms around her.

"Hello," he said softly, and sighed into her hair.

She looked at him. "Pick me up."

He looked puzzled, but did as asked. She wrapped her legs around his waist, and he gave her a slightly amused look before walking into the living room with her in his arms.

She folded her hands behind his neck, and leaned back, looking at him.

"I love that you can carry me around like this."

"I am rather fond of carrying you around like this as well," he said, bemused.

She cocked her head, gazing at him. "I love that you have magic. I love that you are blue. I love that you have red eyes. I love that you have green eyes. I love that you can pull off a helmet with huge golden horns like nobody's business. I love that you are Asgardian. I love that you are a Frost Giant. I love that you are the God of Mischief. I love that you are brilliant, passionate, and fierce."

He had stopped, and was now looking at her with an expression mixed between confusion and surprise. "I - what brought this on? Is there a 'but'?"

She shook her head. "No 'but'."

"Then...why?"

She gazed at him for a moment. "I love you."

His eyes widened in an almost ridiculous way, and she wondered for a moment of he would drop her. He didn't. He didn't speak either, however. He just stared at her.

After a long moment, his expression shifted somewhat, and a chaos of emotions flickered across his face.

She had no need for him to tell her he loved her as well. This was not about that. This was just…she just needed him to know.

She watched him in silence, wondering what was going in inside that head of his.

“I just wanted you to know,” she eventually said. “That’s all.”

The chaos of emotions stilled somewhat, leaving him with eyes filled with pain.

“No,” she said, shaking her head. “Let go of the pain, Loki. It is easy this time. I’m not expecting anything in return. I have no demands, no agenda. I just wanted you to know. I love you.”

Something beeped in the kitchen, and she smiled. “That was dinner. Hopefully. I need to go check on it.”

He was still just looking at her, but eventually he lowered her to the floor, and she just smiled at him before walking into the kitchen.

She decided to stay there for a bit, to allow him a moment to process.

After a few minutes, he came into the kitchen as well, and she was about to turn around when his arms came around her waist, and he buried his face in her hair.

“I am on a culinary adventure of epic proportions today,” she said, amused. “It is all terribly exciting.”

“Are you, really?” he murmured into her hair.

“I am. I am making chicken. But – plot twist – I put it _inside the oven._ Lord knows what is currently going on in there, though. Who knows – perhaps chicken-dust is even better than bacon-dust. Or perhaps we end up with a new pet because suddenly something unpredictable has happened in there and there is an actual live chicken when I open. Like I said – it is all terribly exciting. Also, I am making this exotic gravy - it is exotic because it was supposed to be in a shade of beige somewhere, but what do you know - it's a rather flashy orange. I have no idea how that happened. Did I mention I ordered pizza to be delivered in half an hour?"

There was a long moment of silence, but then Loki burst out laughing. Properly. He actually had to prop his elbows on the kitchen counter, put his head in his hands - and laughed.

Eventually, he managed to stop laughing, and then he wrapped his arms around her, kissed her temple, and nuzzled her hair.

"I love you too."

Her only response was to put her hand over his, entwining their fingers.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	17. Thank God For Pizza Delivery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 17! Woohoo! 
> 
> Thank you yet again for your kudos, and bookmarks! You light up my life!
> 
> Now, let's get on with it, shall we?
> 
> Disclaimer: nope, not mine!

 

-o-

 

He was in the bathroom, staring at his own reflection. 

_I love you._

Three words - three words that was almost unfamiliar to him. No, well - Frigga told him from time to time, even Thor, but this... This was different.

When had he heard those words last? From a lover?

What was her name? Iselda? Yes, that was her name. And she had loved him. He had cared for her as well, but not love. Not truly. Even if he had told her he loved her as well.

When was the last time he had loved someone? Three centuries ago? Or more? He couldn't quite remember. 

Vilda. Oh, how he had loved her. But she had not loved him. She had told him, and he had believed her, fool that he was.

The feeling of utter betrayal when she discarded him like some piece of worthless trash had left him in shattered pieces. 

But overall, Loki had not had much time for love. His life had been filled with Odin, Thor - the eternal struggle to please the bloody man who called himself his father.

But Frigga - she had taught him magic, accepted him, loved him.

And Thor - the mindless brute he had been all his life, head in the clouds, filled with glory and heroic battle.

Insufferable fool. Naive and thoughtless.

But he had loved his brother. Dearly. Thor had never looked down on him. Never. He had always seen Loki as his equal, as his brother, and Loki loved him, naive fool or not. And Thor loved him as well, and fiercely protected him at all times - even when he knew he did not need to do so. He merely could not help himself.

Even now, even if Thor knew Loki's heritage, he acted no different toward him. Even in Loki's darkest moments, Thor had such desperate faith in him. The endless devotion Thor bestowed upon him made his heart twinge.

Loki missed his big brother. 

Sentiment. Foolish sentiment.

And yet, Loki missed his big brother.

He was disappointed - he could not deny it - when Thor had been nowhere to be seen during his 'trial'.

The Avengers took much of his time, he supposed. And Jane. 

Well, he had a newfound understanding for Thor's efforts to see Jane again - to keep her safe from harm.

He had scoffed at his brother back then - and now he was worried when Amber stepped up on a chair.

Amber.

Realising his thoughts had strayed from the original topic, Loki sucked in a breath as reality came to him again.

_I love you._

It had been so unexpected, and he had been so taken aback that he did not know what to do.

_I love that you can carry me around like this._

Loki had been rather confused by the whole thing, because there had been something in her voice, her eyes, and he had understood that she had more to say.

She had proceeded to hold a speech, more or less, and his mind had gone blank.

_I love you._

The words had struck him like lightning, and his mind flooded with emotions in chaotic proportions. Eventually, the pain had struck him. His experience with love - with showing that side of him - it was a string of painful memories.

But then, she had not even demanded an answer. Instead, she had walked into the kitchen, leaving him there to gather his thoughts.

He had not known what to expect when he followed her into the kitchen, but an explanation of exotic cooking had not been one of the things he had considered.

He had laughed until he cried, and then he had told her he loved her as well - impulsively. Not that he did not mean it - because he did. He loved her. But love resulted in so much pain - so much humiliation.

He could not withdraw his words now, however, so he... He did not know how to proceed.

Basically, Loki was terrified. 

-o-

_I should learn how to cook,_ he thought as he heard Amber curse in the kitchen.

"I'm a fucking miracle worker," he heard her murmur, "because how is it possible to fuck up this? Meat - oven - success. Or absolutely not. I hate cooking."

He should definitely learn how to cook. It seemed rather interesting, in fact. He made potions, and that was an art in itself. The correct combination of the correct ingredients - and that was the same for cooking, was it not?"

"I'm really sorry that your life was wasted on me," she heard her say, and laughed when he entered the kitchen.

"Are you apologising to the chicken?"

She raised an eyebrow. "Yes. It deserves an apology. And a burial with orange gravy."

Just then, the doorbell rang, and Amber sighed in relief. "Thank god for pizza delivery."

-o-

Amber was lying in the sofa, with her head on his lap, and her hands folded on her belly, and she was looking rather thoughtful.

“I can’t decide what to buy you for Christmas,” she eventually said. “Because _honestly,_ what in the seventh layer of hell am I supposed to buy for the god of mischief for Christmas?”

Loki gave the woman a surprised look. “You do not need to buy me anything.”

She looked up at him. “I do, actually. But not because I feel obligated to do it, but because I _love_ giving presents. So I _absolutely_ need to buy you a Christmas present. I have some ideas, but… Seriously. Just…seriously.”

He gave her an amused look. “It is not important.”

She rolled her eyes. “I don’t think you understand. Whether or not it is important to you is actually not relevant in this situation. I have spent ten years on making gift-giving an art. Every present is carefully chosen for the specific person after _much_ consideration.”

“Why put so much effort into it?”

“Because it makes people happy, of course.”

“You spend all that time and effort to make someone happy. How very…selfless.”

She gave him an amused look. “Rather the opposite, when you think about it. Giving gifts make _me_ ridiculously happy, and that is what drives me. From a cynical point of view – every single thing a human being does from their free will is based on entirely egotistical reasons. Giving gifts makes _me_ happy. The happier the gift receiver is, the happier I am. It is the opposite of a vicious circle.”

He thought about it for a moment, trying to come up with a situation where someone did something on their own accord purely because it helped someone other than themselves.

He couldn’t. She had a point.

“There is truth there.”

She nodded. “It is the best kind of egoism, however. So I do not mind. Anyway – you are a predicament.”

He chuckled. “I apologise.”

“Apology accepted. But, I will manage, I suppose. Perhaps I will have a better idea next year.”

His mind stopped for a moment. _Next year._ Which meant she assumed it would be a next year. Not so much assumed, perhaps. She was rather realistic, after all. What it _did_ mean, however… It meant that _she_ wanted there to be a next year. It also meant she had no intention of going anywhere anytime soon.

His mind managed to start up again, and he just shook his head. “It is already a novelty to receive a present at all.”

“You will have more than one, though.”

He gave her a puzzled look. “Do not tell me you intend to buy more than one?”

“That is not what I mean,” she said, and got up from the sofa. “I’ll be right back.”

She re-entered the living room a minute or two later, balancing a pile of presents in her arms.

"Take a look, love," she said, and proceeded with dumping the pile of presents on his lap.

He gave her a confused look, and she picked up one of the presents so he could read the 'to' and 'from'.

_To: Loki_

_From: Ambrose_

He stared at the present, utterly confused. "Ambrose? Should I remember who that is?"

Amber laughed. "No. It's my brother."

"What?"

Amber shrugged, as if this was completely normal. "That is from my brother, and the rest are from my mum, dad, sister, two aunts, grandma, my friend May, Allen - and then there is one from my sister's tiny parrot."

He stared at the presents. "I don't understand."

She shrugged again, as if any of this was even close to normal. "That's how my family works. You are celebrating Christmas with me, thus, you get presents. They are really happy that I don't have to spend it alone as well. They are really happy you are here. Which means you even get a present from a bird. I _somehow_ doubt the bird went shopping, however. But I mysteriously get one from the tiny parrot every year, nevertheless."

He couldn't quite make sense of any of this. He was also stupidly emotional over the whole thing.

They were strangers. They had never met him. They did not know who he was, not at all, other than what Amber had told them. And yet, they were _grateful,_ merely because he was here.

“Um,” Amber began, and he could hear a hint of uncertainty in her voice. “Are they unwelcome? I am so used to this – but that does not mean everyone likes and welcomes it.”

He shook his head. “It is…unexpected, that is all.”

“Oh, good,” she said, but then she smirked. “I planned on showering. Want to keep me company?”

This caught his attention, and he gingerly placed the presents on the table before – not so gingerly – picking up Amber, walking toward the bathroom.

 

 

 

 

 

 


	18. I Acquired Them

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 18! *claps hands*
> 
> We are nearing the end! It's rather sad, to be honest, because writing a story is quite the emotional journey.
> 
> I'm not entirely sure how much is left, but at least one chapter, and then an epilogue :)
> 
> Other than that - thank you. You are lovely!
> 
> Anyway, chapter 18, yeah? It's Christmas! xD

-o-

 

Loki was out buying Amber's Christmas present. It was Christmas Eve, and Amber wanted to open the presents tonight instead of Christmas morning, as was the American tradition.

Good thing she wanted to open them tonight, however, because it would be difficult hiding the thing for very long. Good thing he knew a silence spell.

-o-

Celebrating Christmas was a novelty, quite frankly. Amber had a permanent small smile on her face, and her eyes were bright.

They ate food - Amber had ordered from a bunch of different places, and then they moved to the sofa, and Amber chatted happily while organising cake, soda, wine, candy, and whatever else she declared 'mandatory for Christmas'.

Eventually, the time came for presents, and Loki got up from the sofa. "Be right back."

He went to his old bedroom, and cancelled the silence spell before walking back to the living room.

"I could not wrap it, I'm afraid."

Amber gave him a confused look, but her eyes widened when he stepped to the side so the present wouldn't be hidden behind the sofa any longer.

"Nooooo," she breathed. "Oh my god!"

Just then, the tiny budgie in the cage he was holding let out a pip, and Amber squealed in excitement as she bounced over to him. He held out the bird cage for her, and she beamed as she carefully took it.

"Awww, he is just a baby."

Was he, really? How did she know?

"I think it is a he, at least. It's not that easy to tell when they are so young."

“I did not realise you were a bird expert.”

She gave him an amused smile as she gingerly placed the bird cage on the table. “I am a woman of many talents,” she said, and then, a moment later, his arms were full of Amber, and she was kissing him enthusiastically.

“Thank you!” she exclaimed as she let go of him. “I love you!”

She promptly turned around to fawn over the bird again, and Loki was grateful, because the unexpected declaration of love had left him rather breathless.

-o-

"Are you going to open your presents?"

Loki looked at the woman. She was currently sitting on the floor, surrounded by wrapping paper in cheerful colours, and she was rather lovely.

"Yes," he said. "I suppose."

He had a pile of presents in the sofa next to him - twelve, to be exact. And the concept of having twelve presents - 'To: Loki' on each and every one - it was rather strange. In a good way.

He picked up a random present, and began unwrapping.

-o-

A while later - he had taken his time with each present - he had opened ten out of twelve presents. The final two were from Amber, and he decided to save them for last.

In the ten presents he had opened, there had been a variety of things.

A black shirt with a high collar, woolen mittens and a winter hat, both in green and black - Amber's grandmother had _knitted_ them. For _him._ He had a huge jar of Nutella, socks, three books, a scarf, a wallet, two t shirts with funny prints, and a tie in green, black, and gold.

Not only had they given him presents, they had found presents specifically for _him._ Loki found himself rather speechless.

Amber came to sit in the sofa with him, and he carefully moved his new belongings away so she could sit next to him.

He raised an eyebrow, and picked up one of the presents, unwrapping it.

"Amber, you did not buy me a phone."

"You need it. The one you have is barely hanging on."

"It is _expensive."_

She sighed. "I can afford it. And I thought...well, you could probably make things easier for yourself if you had a proper piece of technology. That thing there is the only piece of technology you need - and it's basically exactly the same as the one you have. So you don't have to learn a whole new thing."

He gave her a dark look. He couldn't help it. This was all too expensive, and then she had to remind him that he wasn't exactly a genius at technology - or anything for that matter - here in Midgard.

She sighed. "I have had the same type of phone for five years because then I don't have to learn a whole new thing, so that was not aimed at you specifically. And if you give me _one_ more dark look, I will either cry, or become really angry. I have no idea which it will be, and I will have little say in the matter, because my emotional state is somewhat fragile right now. I wear my heart and emotions on my sleeve on Christmas Eve, because that is who I am, basically. And then we have the fact that I miss my mum, my sister – even the bloody homebrewed, gross Christmas beer they make every year. And my economic status will not even _register_ the fact that I bought you a phone. I bought the bloody thing because you need it. If you had needed a particular _hat_ , I would have bought you a hat. This was not meant as an insult to your pride. Because I’m not an asshole, simply put. Now, either you accept the thing, or I throw it out the window. I just do not have the energy to walk on eggshells around you right now.”

 _No no no no no no no,_ Loki thought as he realised what he was doing. Why had he not realised? Why had he not _thought_ about this? Because he had been so busy thinking about himself.

He almost winced when he had a second realisation. Amber thrived on giving presents. And he had promptly disapproved, and then given her an annoyed, dark look. And now, she looked small. Sad. All because of him. Brilliant.

“No no no no no,” he said, and promptly pulled her up on his lap, wrapping his arms around her. “No, dear one, that was not my intent, and it was thoughtless of me. Forgive me. If I am to be honest - I am rather overwhelmed. The things you count as normal, I count as a novelty. I forget myself. I did not think." She looked slightly surprised, and he sighed. "Sometimes, even I can see where I stepped wrong. I apologise."

She gazed at him for a long moment before raising an eyebrow. "Does this mean you will patiently listen when I enthusiastically tell you about all the amazing things that phone can do? Not now, though. Tomorrow, perhaps."

"Will you forgive me if I do."

"Completely."

"Then I will most definitely patiently listen. I may even attempt to not roll my eyes."

She chuckled. "Perish the thought. That would be unsettling."

He inwardly sighed in relief, and pulled her close to kiss her.

She pulled back after a bit, and gestured at the second present. "Will you open it? And don't worry, I did not even spend any money on it."

He gave her a puzzled look, but picked up the present, placing it in her lap, and began unwrapping.

It was a book, that much one could deduce, even before unwrapping it. One thick book, or two average-sized books.

Books she had not paid for. Something she already owned, perhaps? Loki had no idea.

There was something special about these books – it _had_ to be, because she was silent as the grave when he began unwrapping. And her eyes were fixed on his hands.

He gave her a puzzled look, but then focused on the task at hand.

He folded the paper aside, revealing – yes, two books.

Amber’s eyes were no longer on his hands, but on him. Briefly sidetracked by her intense eyes, he picked up the top book while looking at Amber.

When he finally looked at the book, he promptly dropped it. Wide-eyed, he leaned forward, not believing what he was seeing.

"Amber," he whispered, "how in the nine realms..."

 _'Magicks of the Minds - the Core of Creation'_ was the title of the book.

One of the rarest books on magic there was.

"Do you like it?" she said quietly before gesturing at the book. "There's another one."

Did he like it? Did he _like_ it? Speechless, that was what he was.

He gently lifted the rare treasure of a book, just to be gobsmacked a second time.

 _'Shield Sorcery - Healing the Whole'_ was the title. Not as rare as the first, but quite close.

"This is... How did you manage this? These are... Do you _know_ how extremely rare these are?"

She rolled her eyes, for some reason. "I have an inkling, yes."

"Frigga is involved, I assume?"

Amber nodded. "She helped me, yes."

"I did not know she had these in her possession."

"She didn't. She knew who did, however."

"So she acquired them for you?"

Amber shook her head. "I acquired them."

Loki merely stared at her. "May we stop with the guessing game? Because I am quite frankly all too interested in hearing how in the _world_ you acquired these books."

Amber chuckled, but nodded. "I may or may not have visited Asgard yesterday."

_"What?"_

"I may or may not have proceeded to visit a well-known collector of rare treasures, and then a rather eccentric lady who was every bit a cliché witch from a Disney movie."

"You decided to _stroll around_ in Asgard?"

She nodded. "Frigga was strolling right alongside me, however.”

"You said you spent no money on this... Did my mother pay for it?"

Amber shook her head. “I’ll just start from the beginning, shall I?”

 _Rather yesterday,_ Loki thought, but merely nodded.

“All right. I bought the phone – all well and good, but it did not feel…right. What can I honestly get you here in Midgard that would make you genuinely happy? I could not think of much. Another thing that did not feel right – and haven’t felt right for a while now – is how you do not use magic. Not at all, Loki. Not when I have been around, at least. And that doesn’t sit well with me. Anyway, there aren’t exactly a magical shop around here, so I had a chat with Heimdall – and by chat, I mean I talked to the ceiling while feeling ridiculous – and asked if Frigga perhaps had a moment. She did, in fact, have a moment, and beamed down here. I told her about my obsession with Christmas presents, and asked if she had any suggestions – preferably within the magic-area. She talked about books in her library, and some new books that had recently come on the market. She asked me why it had to be magic, and I told her I had not seen you use magic for two weeks. Sorry if I overstepped somehow. It seemed harmless enough, and I needed help.”

He shook his head. “It was harmless.”

She sighed in relief. “Good. I am glad I told her, however, because she looked like I just told her Heimdall quit his job and I was to take over as guard of the rainbow bridge. Anyway, your mother got this look of determination, and before I knew it, she had beamed back up, and then returned here half an hour later with an idea. Nor the collector or the stereotypical witch would sell the books for money, but Frigga suspected they could be convinced by mysterious, foreign objects. I changed my clothes, packed my bags, and she brought me with her.”

“You packed your bags?”

"I'll get to that in a minute," she said, smiling. "Frigga put a glamour on me, because why not, and then we ventured out in Asgard - Asgard, wow, by the way. I took the role of tradesman - or woman - with only vares from Midgard - very exotic, and all. The collector who had the 'Magicks of the Mind' book was actually downright enthusiastic when he realised he could get his hands on Midgardian items, and was instantly willing to trade for the book if the deal was good enough. I didn't have high hopes, considering my bags were filled with Nutella, candy, a selection of books, some clothes, and a whole lot of items made of plastic - or had shiny colours."

"Well, obviously you got the book. What did you trade?"

"A Rubik's cube, a jar of Nutella, two tiny elephants with led lights inside - changing colour all the time - and three books."

Loki had to laugh. "And he thought this was a fair deal."

She nodded. "I felt somewhat awful, quite frankly, but he was thrilled, so I don't think it mattered that much to him. The book was just another item in his collection, after all. Next was the stereotypical witch, and she turned out to be more of a challenge. Two jars of Nutella, my coat, my sunglasses - she looked rather fabulous in them - four books, five different items made in plastic, two in shiny colours - but in the end, do you know what made her decide to trade?"

"I do not."

"Three packs of twizzlers."

Loki had to laugh again.

His mind paused suddenly - realising how much effort she had put into this - what lengths she had gone to, so he could be happy. Not only that, but because he hadn't used magic in two weeks, and 'that did not sit well with her'. Although, why did it not sit well with her? One thing was acceptance, but encouragement was a different thing entirely.

Another thing - she had noticed that he had not used magic. She even knew how much time had passed.

He did not. He was aware of the fact that he had not used much magic lately, but two weeks without? _That_ he did not realise. She did.

The logical thing to do in this situation - for someone sane - would be to not mention it at all. To let it slide, and hope it would become a permanent thing. The death and destruction he had wrought on the city... Well, someone with their sanity intact would definitely not _encourage_ him like this. He was a powerful sorcerer - very much so - and then there was the fact that he was a Frost Giant - but raised as an Asgardian. It made him unique. And it always have him an advantage.

There were not many who could consider them his equal. And the number of people who could consider themselves more powerful than him - he could count it on one hand.

He was one of the most powerful sorcerers in the nine realms, he had tried to conquer the world, and generally caused ridiculous amounts of pain and death wherever he went. And yet, she encouraged him, even if his magic was how he managed to cause those ridiculous amounts of pain and death. Not only encourage, but go to through an ordeal, just for him.

And now, he had two of the rarest books on magic there was. Well, he would most definitely use magic in the time ahead.

"Anyway, I hope you like them."

"'Like' is practically an insult," he said, gently lifting a book so he could study it. "That is how far I am from merely 'liking' them."

"Quite worth a Rubik's Cube and a pair of sunglasses."

He chuckled. "Indeed," he said, and then gave her a small smile. "Thank you."

She beamed at him. "I am happy you are happy. Now, will you stop unsettling me with weeks void of magic?"

He gazed at her for a bit. "Why is this important to you?"

She shrugged. This woman shrugged at the oddest times. She shrugged - again in a situation he found surreal - and she did not find it surreal at all.

"Because you wouldn't be you without your magic. And I am not about to watch the God of Mischief go from Norse god and fierce warrior to domestic extraordinaire. You are not made for that, in my honest opinion. Domestic life is lovely, and downright wonderful sometimes, but with _only_ that, one will wither away. I know I would. I think you even more so. Thus, you can work in a soup kitchen, you can be as domestic as you want, but you can be the powerful sorcerer - all at the same time."

He pulled her to him, and kissed her soundly.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	19. Please Forgive Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 19! Woop!
> 
> Thank you for being the wonderful people you are!
> 
> Disclaimer: (which I may or may not have forgotten a couple of times) Not mine, yo!

 

-o-

 

Christmas was lovely, Loki decided. And Amber kept saying things like _'we should get more of these cookies next year'_ and _'next year, we need prettier curtains'._

Not that Loki actually cared about curtains, but he cared about the way Amber kept saying sentences with the words 'we' and 'next year'. She said those things unfazed, as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

"Maybe we should buy a tree made of plastic next year," Amber said, pulling him from his thoughts with another of her 'next year' sentences. "Because I'm going to be vacuuming pine needles for weeks." She paused, glaring at the floor. "I guess I'll get the vacuum cleaner."

"Or not," Loki replied, and made a fluid motion with his hand in the direction of the tree.

Amber stared at the floor for a long moment before turning to him with wide eyes. "Wow! Okay, we're not buying a tree made of plastic. Because wow! No more pine needles on the floor!” She smirked. “Next year is going to be so much easier.”

He leaned forward in the sofa, resting his elbows on his thighs and clasping his hands. “Will there be a next year?”

He didn’t quite know why he had asked. He had not intended to. The words just escaped his mouth before he could think twice.

She gave him a puzzled look. “Why?” she asked, and her puzzled expression turned worried. “Don’t you want it to be a next year?”

“That is not what I am saying,” he said, and watched as she came over to him. He took her hand, and pulled her down onto his lap.

“Then what are you saying?” she asked, and put her arms around his neck, looking rather worried.

He gazed at her for a moment. "You speak so easily about it, as if it's a certain thing. I find I am...less certain." He watched as her face fell, and immediately shook his head. "Not because I do not _wish_ for it, because I _do_ wish for it. But I rarely get what I wish for."

Her eyes softened as she understood the meaning of his words. "It's different this time, though, isn't it? Look, I'm not saying that everything is going to be fine and dandy all the time. We are going to fight, I'm going to be mad at you, you're going to be mad at me, and we will have days where everything sucks. Other than that... We never know what will happen. There may be unexpected complications - things we did not foresee, or something may happen, and there might not be a next year. What I _do_ know, however, is that I _want_ there to be a next year, and that I am not going anywhere. So until the point where something tells me otherwise, I am going to assume there will be a next year.”

"I love you," he said unthinkingly, and sort of froze when he realised what he was saying. Not that he didn't love Amber, because he did. He truly did. But the fear of rejection was so ingrained in him that he more or less automatically assumed that a display of emotions like this - showing weakness - would be thrown back in his face.

"I love you too," Amber replied softly, and leaned in to kiss him. 

Tension left Loki's body from hearing her words, and he sighed softly as he closed his eyes, responding to Amber's kiss.

-o-

It was afternoon, New Year’s Eve, and Amber was in the kitchen, attempting to bake some form of cake when she heard a startled yelp from the living room.

She brushed off her hands before going to investigate.

"Brother!" she heard a voice exclaim, and entered the living room to find Loki standing there with clenched fists, and eyes full of anger. Anger and pain.

Oh, and they had a visitor. Said visitor had long, blond hair, was wearing a red cape, and his blue eyes were fixed on the angry God of Mischief.

Thor was here.

“I am not your brother!” Loki replied, and his voice trembled with anger. Thor took a step forward, but when Loki immediately stepped back, Thor stopped, gazing at Loki for a moment.

“But you _are_ my brother, Loki,” Thor said, and Amber could see the pain in his eyes, and hear the grief in his voice. “You have always been my brother, and I have loved you as such my entire life – as I do now. You will always be my brother.”

“Then where _were_ you?" Loki almost spat. "Where was all that brotherly love when I was taken to Asgard for trial? I was to be _executed,_ and you did not even bother to show. You claim to love me so dearly, but where _were_ you? Surely, if you care so much, you would have at least come to your _brother’s_ trial, or at least have sought me out after. And yet, I have not seen you in two months.”

“I did not know, Loki,” Thor said quietly, and he glanced down on his feet before meeting Loki’s eyes again. “I have not been to Asgard for a long time. I have been searching for you.”

Something flickered in Loki’s eyes at that, but then his face contorted with anger again. “Do you truly expect me to believe that? Do you expect me to believe that no one informed you? Neither of my trial, nor of my whereabouts in the time after?”

Thor gave Loki a remorseful look. "I hid."

"Pardon?"

Thor sighed. "I hid, Loki. From Heimdall. After you vanished - I searched for you. After seven days of searching, I went back to Asgard, and father wanted for me to remain there. I disagreed, we fought, and I left. I cloaked myself to avoid being followed. But I could not find you, so I travelled back to Asgard to learn you had already been found."

Loki looked less angry now, but his expression was closed off. "And when was this? When did you return to Asgard? Considering how _desperately_ you wanted to find me, it must have been difficult for you to resist seeking me out in the time after. Yet, I have not seen you."

Thor gave Loki a defeated look. "This was an hour ago, Loki."

Loki snorted a laugh. "Do not tell me you spent two months searching for me. Or were you so desperate for me to face execution, and that was why you searched for me?"

"No! Never! I would have done anything to keep you from being executed! I searched for you because... Because I feared someone else would find you, brother. I needed to – I needed to find you before something happened to you."

Amber decided to give them some privacy – at least speak without her watching them – and silently walked back into the kitchen.

-o-

Loki’s mind was just a chaos of emotions. Anger, grief, and surprisingly – disappointment. He had not realised until now how disappointed he had been when Thor was not there at his return to Asgard. He had felt betrayed, in fact, when he realised Thor would not be there, and that he would be facing execution without his big brother there. He had been so angry, so…afraid. He did not wish to die, after all. Loki had felt so utterly alone, and eventually he had just shut off his emotions the best he could, leaving him empty and desolate.

“Please, brother.”

Loki searched Thor’s face, looking for deceit or any sign he was lying. He so desperately wanted it to be true, that Thor had searched relentlessly for him because of the same foolish reason as always – to protect his little brother.

Thor’s expressive face showed no hint of lies, no deceit.

Thor looked so grief-stricken where he stood that it made Loki’s heart twinge painfully. “Please what, Thor?” he asked, not knowing what else to say.

“Please forgive me.”

Loki had not expected Thor to ask for forgiveness – he did not even know _what_ he wanted forgiveness for. Last he’d seen Thor, Loki had _stabbed_ him, and yet _Thor_ was the first to ask for forgiveness.

This frustrated him. Thor always frustrated him, with his naïve optimism and forgiving nature. Thor had such faith in the world – in everyone – and wore his heart on his sleeve like it was a prize he had won.

Thor was still looking at Loki with eyes filled with sadness, and for some reason the sight made anger flare in him.

"Why do you always do this, Thor!? Do you even _know_ what you are asking forgiveness for!? It's the same as when you stood in front of the Destroyer - you apologised, but you knew not what you were apologising for!" Loki stepped closer to Thor, shaking with anger. "Why would you _do_ such a thing? Why did you do that, knowing I wanted you dead!? And why - _why_ \- are you asking for my forgiveness now, when _I_ am the one who should be asking for _yours!?"_

He had not meant to say that. It had just slipped out. It had slipped out, and now it was too late to take it back. Loki froze on spot, staring at Thor. He watched then, as Thor's expression went through a series of emotions - shock, doubt, hope, and then - finally - joy.

"Brother," Thor breathed, and before Loki could do anything about it, Mjolnir fell to the floor with a clang, and Thor closed the distance between them, pulling Loki into a crushing embrace.

Loki didn't quite know what to do, but save for using magic, there was not much he _could_ do. When it came to physical strength, Thor had the upper hand.

"You never needed to ask for my forgiveness, little brother," Thor said as he released Loki from the embrace, still holding a firm grip on his upper arms. "You may have made many mistakes, Loki, but as have I. You ask if I know what I ask forgiveness for – yes, I do. I ask forgiveness for not being the brother you needed. We were raised together, but you remember our upbringing differently than I, and now I understand why. But though I understand, I do not know all the situations where I have wronged you, because I do not see them as you do. And that is why I will say the same as when standing in front of the Destroyer – brother, whatever I have done to wrong you, whatever I have done to lead you to do this, I am truly sorry.”

“Thor, I…”

“There is more, Loki,” Thor interrupted, and Loki fell silent. “I ask your forgiveness for not seeing – for not realising you were not yourself. I should have seen… I should have known. I asked you who controls the would-be king, and you never denied that your mind was not your own. I should have known then, because you focused on me calling you would-be king, and not how I accused you of being under someone else’s command. You would never take such an accusation lightly. I should have known.” Thor paused for a moment, and his eyes saddened. “And finally, I ask for your forgiveness for not being there when you were taken back to Asgard. Will you forgive me, little brother?”

Loki’s eyes brimmed with tears then, because Thor was such a fool, standing there with his heart on his sleeve and hope in his eyes.

And Loki could not make himself – _would_ not make himself tell Thor no.

Gazing into those hopeful, blue eyes, Loki sighed. “Yes.”

Thor’s expression changed, and the pure _joy_ radiating from him was almost ridiculous.

Loki’s voice was soft when he spoke again. “You are a fool, brother.”

Thor’s face fell then, and Loki wondered if he somehow had truly offended him. When Thor’s eyes filled with tears, Loki understood even less.

“You called me brother,” Thor almost whispered before hesitating for a moment. “Are we brothers again?”

He had not even realised that he had called Thor brother. Although, who was he kidding? Thor would always be his brother.

“Yes,” Loki said, softly. “Yes, we are brothers again.”

The bone-crushing embrace Loki found himself in a second later made him let out a small, strangled sound. Thor heard, apparently, because he eased up a bit.

“In some ways, I may have been Odin’s favourite.” Thor said softly, still holding Loki. “But you were always mine.”

Loki couldn’t stop himself as his arms came up on their own accord, returning Thor’s embrace.

They stood like that for a long moment, but then Thor stepped back, beaming at Loki. “Where is your Amber?”

Loki chuckled, nodding his head toward the kitchen. “In the kitchen, pretending that she is not listening to every word we are saying.”

Amber appeared in the doorway to the kitchen, flour on her nose and apron. “It’s not my fault that you decided to do this in hearing range.”

Thor’s expression lit up even more – how that was possible Loki did not know – and promptly walked over to Amber, embracing her. He let her go a moment later, and Amber took a deep breath – which was not an unusual reaction to one of the Thunderer's hugs/

Thor took Amber’s hand, and Loki had to stifle a laugh from Amber’s expression – she clearly did not quite know how to behave in this situation.

Thor inclined his head. “I am honoured to meet you.”

“Likewise,” Amber squeaked, and Loki could not stifle his laugh this time.

“Let the woman have her personal space,” Loki said with an amused voice as he walked over to them. “You are overwhelming her.”

Thor stepped back immediately. “I apologise.”

Amber looked at Loki and rolled her eyes before turning her gaze on Thor. “You have nothing to apologise for. It is lovely to meet you.” She paused, glanced at Loki, and then cocked her head. “Would you like to join us for New Year’s Eve?”

Thor probably had no idea what Amber meant, but he beamed anyway. “I would be delighted!”

Loki could not help himself. “Do you even know what she means?”

“No,” Thor said, shaking his head. “But it matters not, if it means I may spend time with you.” Thor paused, looking at Loki. "Will you explain?"

Something softened inside Loki. “Today is the last day of the Midgardian year. It is celebrated with food and beverages, and at midnight we are to go outside and 'watch the fireworks'."

Amber rolled her eyes. "No need to get all sassy about the fireworks. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised, because it's quite lovely to watch." She smiled at Thor. "It's dinner, wine, and perhaps even cake if I don't mess up too badly."

Thor looked beyond delighted. "So it is a night for celebration?"

"Yes," Loki said, and was promptly pulled into another bone-crushing embrace.

"This is a most joyous day!" Thor boomed, and Loki couldn't do anything but laugh.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	20. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the epilogue, you guys!
> 
> Thank you for your feedback, comments, kudos, bookmarks, just EVERYTHING! I love you all!

 

-o-

“Did you speak to Thor?” Amber asked as she found Loki in the living room. “Will he be joining us?”

Loki snorted a laugh. “Yes. I believe his exact words were ‘I shall be honoured to partake in the celebration of Christmas’. So yes, he is coming here later today.”

Amber laughed. “That sounds like him. Did you see Frigga as well? Did you give her the present?”

“My mother found me within the first five minutes I arrived in Asgard. She always does, I know not how. But yes, I gave her your present. She seemed a bit confused at first, but was thrilled once I explained. She sends her thanks.”

Amber smiled as she walked over to kiss him, and he smiled back as he wrapped his arms around her, returning the kiss.

“And how was your day?” Loki asked as he pulled back, and proceeded to raise an eyebrow when he noticed a white spot on her cheek. “Don’t tell me – you are baking.”

She gave him a sheepish smile. “Yes. And I may or may not be failing at it.”

He rolled his eyes again. “Amber…”

She mimicked his jaded look. “Loki…”

“You are insufferable.”

“Yes,” she quipped, giving him a wicked smile, “you tell me so frequently. Now, are you going to stand here, or are you going to help me?”

He sighed. “The latter, obviously.”

Laughing, Amber pulled him with her into the kitchen.

-o-

Amber yelped when there was a sudden flash of light in the living room, but she smiled when she saw Thor standing there. He was beaming.

"I thank you for including me in your celebration!" he boomed as he closed the distance between them to give her a hug - again squeezing the air from her lungs. Letting go of her, he looked around. "Is my brother at home?"

"I am," Loki replied as he came into view in the doorway to the kitchen.

"Brother!"

Loki rolled his eyes when Thor came over to him, but allowed himself to be pulled in for a hug.

A displeased chirp was heard then, and Amber had to laugh when she noticed Shakespeare (yes, she had named the budgie Shakespeare) sitting on Loki's head.

"Hello there," Thor cooed, and Amber had to laugh again when he held up a hand, and the tiny parrot flew down and landed on the God of Thunder's finger. Shakespeare proceeded to fly off again, landing on Thor's head, chirping happily.

Loki rolled his eyes and shook his head, but his expression was not even slightly annoyed. He looked happy, in fact, and the sight put a soft smile on Amber's face.

"You are all insufferable,” Loki huffed, apparently noticing Amber’s soft smile. “Yes, even you,” he continued, pointing at Shakespeare. The bird promptly flew down and landed on the finger pointing at him, and Loki gave the bird a jaded look before lifting his hand so Shakespeare was directly in front of his face. “Especially you.”

Shakespeare – completely unfazed by the God of Mischief’s insults – shuffled over to the tip of Loki’s finger, and chirped lovingly as he stretched his tiny body, nuzzling Loki’s nose.

“Why do I even bother?” Loki asked the bird before moving his hand, dropping Shakespeare onto his shoulder. He looked up, and Amber assumed that Thor was sporting a rather amused expression, if Loki’s face was anything to go by. “You are setting the table.”

“Setting the table?” Thor asked, obviously confused. “But, brother, I-“

“Have no idea how to set a table,” Loki interrupted. “I know. That is why you are doing it.” Amber laughed, and Loki pointed a finger at her. “And you should stop that, lest you want to vacuum pine needles till the end of January.”

Amber managed to stop laughing, but couldn’t help the mirth in her eyes. She gave a salute. “Yes, sir.”

Loki smirked. “There we go, that is the kind of behaviour I like."

“I shall set the table!” Thor exclaimed enthusiastically, and this time it was Loki who laughed.

-o-

Christmas dinner was lovely, and Amber shooed away the two gods when they had finished eating. "I'll clean up. You two go relax."

The two gods moved over to the sofa, and Amber hummed to herself as she began clearing the table.

She heard Loki laugh while placing plates in the dishwasher, and the sound made her smile.

Oh, how life could change in a mere year. She lived with the God of Mischief, and had done so for more than a year now. The God of Thunder visited regularly, and even the Goddess of Foreknowledge and Wisdom visited from time to time.

The Goddess of Foreknowledge and Wisdom was practically Amber's mother in law. The thought made Amber snort a laugh. It was all so absurd. Surreal.

And she wouldn't have it any other way.

-o-

They had opened presents, and were now sitting in the sofa, just relaxing. Shakespeare was sitting on Thor's head, and Thor was telling a story about his latest escapades with the Avengers, resulting in Shakespeare chirping in annoyance every time Thor moved too much.

The sight was hilarious. Shakespeare had taken a liking to Thor, but even more so - Loki. The tiny bird actually preferred Loki over Amber, something Amber couldn't help being utterly amused by. Shakespeare tended to fly over to sit on Loki's shoulder, nibbling on his earlobe and chirping directly into his ear. Loki huffed and frequently tried to shoo away the bird, but it had little effect, and eventually, Loki more or less gave up.

-o-

It was late night when another visitor arrived. Amber flinched by the sudden bright light, but smiled when she saw Frigga standing there.

Amber actually adored Frigga. The woman had at some point become - Amber didn't quite know how to describe it - a friend, perhaps. A person she went to for advice, or just to talk.

Frigga greeted her sons before turning to Amber. "I hope I am not arriving at an inconvenient time?"

Getting up from the sofa, Amber walked over to hug the Goddess of Foreknowledge and Wisdom. 

"Frigga," Amber said, smiling. "Of course it isn't inconvenient. It's lovely to see you. It is always lovely to see you. Would you care for some wine? Tea? Christmas cookies?"

Frigga laughed. "Always so gracious. No thank you, my dear. I am here for a reason."

There was something in Frigga's voice that made Amber pause. "Nothing is wrong, I hope?"

Frigga took both of Amber's hands in hers as she shook her head. "Nothing is wrong. I am here to present you with a gift."

"Oh," Amber said, giving the woman a soft smile. "That's very sweet of you. Did you like your present?"

"I did, very much so," Frigga said, and then paused for a moment, letting go of Amber's hands. "I have something for you - something I hope you will accept."

Amber had a feeling this was something out of the ordinary, and did not quite know what to say, so she opted for watching as Frigga collected something from within her cloak, presenting it to Amber.

It was a small box – about the size of a Rubik’s Cube – and from the looks of it, it was made of silver. Amber did not know what to say. She merely looked at the small box, studied the beautiful engravings and inscribed runes.

Amber did eventually meet Frigga’s eyes again. “It is beautiful. Too beautiful.”

Smiling, Frigga shook her head. “My dear, it is not too beautiful. I had it made for you – for this occasion. But the true gift is inside. Will you open it?”

The tone in Frigga’s voice told her that this was  _truly_  something out of the ordinary, and Amber’s hands shook when she accepted the box. She studied it for a moment before taking a deep breath, and opened the small lid.

She didn’t know what she had expected, and looking at the contents of the box did absolutely nothing to make things clearer.

Confused, Amber looked at Frigga. “I am sorry – I don’t understand. It is…an apple.”

 _“What?”_  Loki exclaimed, and Amber flinched when he was suddenly there, staring at the box she held in her hands. After a moment, he spoke again, and his voice was barely a whisper. “Mother…”

“It is time, is it not?” Frigga said, softly. “It is something we have spoken of for some time now, Odin and I. We feel it is time.” Looking at Amber again, Frigga continued. “Will you accept it?”

-o-

Loki felt as if he couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t think. He didn’t even notice when Thor came over.

“This is an extraordinary gift,” Thor said, and his voice sounded just as shocked as Loki felt. “It gladdens my heart beyond words."

“I am really sorry,” Amber said in an almost panicked voice. “But could someone explain to me what this is, exactly?”

“The Golden Apples of Idunn,” Thor explained, but Amber still looked just as confused.

“They grant immortality, Amber,” Loki almost whispered. “Taking one bite of this apple would make you immortal.”

Amber fell silent, and Loki watched her as her expression went completely blank. Fear filled him then. This was something they rarely spoke of, because every time the subject of immortality came up, Loki ended up in a dark mood.

Loki was immortal. Amber was not. Human lives were short, fleeting, and eventually he would lose her. Loki could not - would not - think about it. The thought of losing Amber - he could not bear it. He had lived for more than a millennium, and this was the first time he was truly happy. But happiness was fleeting, just as human lives were fleeting. The thought of continuing his life without Amber in it - living for thousands of years without her - it was a thought he kept locked away, deep in his mind.

He knew of Idunn's Golden Apples of course, and it was something he had thought about more than once. He had even considered going to the Allfather, begging if he must, but he knew it would be for naught.

All through history, only six Midgardians had been granted one of Idunn’s Golden Apples.  _Six._  Not in his wildest dreams had he even  _considered_  that this could happen, that Odin would find Loki’s happiness worthy of a seventh apple. Because that was it, was it not? Amber had not performed miracles, nor had she made an impact on the world, not on the larger scale. She had made an impact on Loki’s world, yes, but on the larger scale of things, Amber was just another human being. And yet, here she was, holding a silver box with a Golden Apple inside. Loki was speechless.

Amber was still completely silent, her face blank, and Loki felt as if he couldn’t breathe, waiting for Amber’s reply.

He did not know if Amber actually  _wanted_  immortality. Since they rarely spoke of it, and Loki knew it would never happen, he had never asked her, because that would only make it worse, no matter what her answer was. Knowing that she  _wanted_  immortality, that she wanted to stay with him – it would make it harder to lose her. Was it the other way around, that she did  _not_  want immortality… This too was painful to think about, because if miracles happened, and Amber was given the option of becoming immortal just to decline… It would break him.

And so, he had never asked, and now he was standing there, waiting for her answer while terror ran through his veins.

Frigga was the one to finally break the silence. “The day you decorated the Christmas tree – do you remember?”

Amber finally turned her gaze away from the apple, looking at Frigga. “When Loki was away,” Amber whispered. “Yes, I remember.”

“Do you still feel the same?”

“Yes,” Amber replied without hesitation. “Yes, I do.”

“Then the answer should be easy.”

It was like Frigga’s words snapped Amber out of a trance, and she turned to Loki. “What do you think?”

Loki just stared at her for a moment, trying to make his brain comply. “What do I think? What do you mean?”

Amber nodded at the apple. “This. Me. Immortality.” When Loki didn’t answer, Amber continued. “Simply put; do you want me to eat the apple?”

Loki hated himself for what he was about to say. “This is not a decision for me to make, Amber. This choice is yours.”

“I know that, but I already know what I would choose. Now, answer my question.”

He gazed at her for a long moment. “Yes. Yes, I want you to eat the apple.”

Amber gave him a small smile. “I was hoping you would say that.”

Amber picked up the apple, and took a bite.

 

 

 

 


End file.
